What Shall I do, That I May Inherit Eternal Life?

Loved my study today! I was asking myself why it's so hard for me to maintain the progress I've made and stick to the goals I have. I know that I have desires to be close to God and that there are specific commandments, counsel, and guidance from the spirit that I have received and that I know to be true- yet I still find myself falling short again and again.
So the biggest question I asked today was, what lack I yet? What am I missing that makes it so hard for me to feel like I am doing my best?
My answer came as I read in Alma 22 and Mark 10 this fine day: it all comes down to the condition of my heart.

Both of these chapters include characters that want to draw closer to Christ. In Alma chapter 22, we have King Lamoni's father, expressing his desire to "give away all [he] possesses in order to come closer to God and inherit eternal life. In Mark 10, we follow the story of the rich young ruler, who approaches Christ and asks what more he needs to do to also inherit eternal life. Although there are many similarities between the two, there are also many characteristics that set them apart and ultimately determine their decisions.

Similarities:

• Both have high social status/power in their societies
• Both are extremely well off, rich, taken care of
• Both express a desire to take action to come closer to Christ
• Both seek out a priesthood leader for counsel/guidance
• Rich ruler= Christ
• Lamoni's father= Aaron

Differences

• Lamoni grew up without the gospel/commandments
• Rich young ruler grew up living the gospel
• Lamoni offers his kingdom and possessions immediately
• Rich young ruler asks what he needs to do, but does not offer any solution
• And when given an answer, is unwilling to follow through
• Condition of the heart
• Rich ruler= unwilling to let go of his possessions in order to draw close to God
• Lamoni's dad= committed to changing his heart, giving away possessions

God and Christ didn't really want the young man's possessions in Mark 10. They already own everything anyway- they've given us this earth, all the objects and such found on it- but they do not own our agency, which includes our hearts. They will not control our actions or force us to do anything against our will. The deepest desire of their hearts is for us to willingly follow the example of Christ so we can return to our Father in Heaven. The young ruler was unable to follow Christ, not because he was rich, but because He was not willing to put God first. 

Contrast that with Lamoni's father, and we see a man that not only offers his physical possessions to know God, but is willing to fully humble himself and follow the direction of a priesthood leader and completely change his behavior.

What causes that desire to change behavior? True doctrine understood. Aaron teaches Lamoni's father the Plan of Salvation, and he understands that without the help of Christ, he has no way to return to God. He also realizes his need to change, or his need for repentance. Once he recognizes that his actions will no longer be acceptable if he wants to return to God's presence, he asks what he must do to change. I love that. And I love that he could start where he was. He didn't have to wait until someone else was ready. He didn't have to hide away or keep himself from Aaron out of shame- he was given the chance, by Christ, to change immediately, without penalty.

I know that I forget the bigger picture a lot, and I often find it difficult to remember why I do the things God asks of me. But I am so grateful for the reminders he sends me, through the spirit, scripture study, and  influence of those around me that He is there, He loves me, and He wants the very best for me. I know that's true for each one of us and I know that I have the power to do anything through Christ.

I love you and hope you have a great week!

Emily

I am not come to destroy but to fulfill

Acts 7. In this chapter, Stephen, a newly called disciple, is on trial for preaching about Christ. He is in quite a pickle, seeing his accusers hired false witnesses to convict him, claiming that he is tearing down Moses's credibility and trying to replace him with Christ. Stephen, knowing their true intentions, follows the spirit and shows them that Moses's role was to prepare the way for Christ by starting with Abraham, then expanding to Jacob, Joseph, and all the way down to Moses. 
From his examples, we learn:

• "For after much tribulation cometh the blessing." (D&C 103:12)
• Must experience darkness to comprehend light
• Joseph's trials in Egypt, being sold by brother, thrown into jail, then saves Egypt and family from famine
• Christ's suffering=allowed him to fulfill his role as savior=led to the resurrection
• "Must needs be an opposition in all things." (2 Nephi 2:11)
• Joseph's brothers, Potiphar's wife, being in prison= helped him become who God wanted him to be
• Moses= Not everyone wanted to listen to him, built a golden calf, would rather not listen to him
• "To whom our fathers would not obey, but thrust him from them and in their hearts turned back again into Egypt." (Acts 7:39)
• Christ= rejected daily by his own people

I'm starting to see a pattern here. People have a really hard time accepting modern revelation through God's prophet(s). The people putting Stephen on trial kept using Moses as their justification as to the way they treated him. However, had they truly been studying Moses's story and his teachings like Stephen, they would recognize that Christ is a continuation, not a replacement for Moses and what he taught. Stephen points out that Joseph of Egypt was rejected by his brothers, that Moses was rejected by the children of Isreal, which means that God's chosen servants have always been rejected by the world. That sounds a lot like what goes on now. 
Many people dismiss specific revelation or counsel from modern prophets because they feel they are taking away from what Christ taught. When we take the time to find the answers for ourselves, we can learn that "I [God] will bring this part of my gospel to the knowledge of my people. Behold, I do not bring it to destroy that which they have received, but to build it up." (D&C 10:52-54) Sound familiar? It's the same idea that Christ gave when he was not being accepted in Jerusalem: "Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfill." (Matthew 5:17) God has always provided a way for us to know His will, individually, and collectively as His children while here in mortality. Sometimes it's hard to understand why their are certain limits, rules, and commandments given to us by his living prophet/apostles. I think the important thing to remember is that the reason we have them is because God loves us. He wants us to know what we need to do and more importantly, who we need to become to live the highest quality of life here on earth, and especially to prepare us to live with Him again.

I kind of feel like I was a little all over the place, but I hope my study made sense in some way. I feel like I was reminded about the importance of finding answers for myself- and I enjoyed that quite a lot.

Thanks and have a great week!
Emily

And Ye Shall Offer A Broken Heart

Great study today in Acts, chapter 5. Although this story seems dramatic at first glance, the symbolism behind what occurs definitely applies to us as we navigate this crazy life. So at the start of this chapter, we are introduced to Ananias and his wife, Sapphira, who sell a piece of land for a certain amount of money. Once they receive the money, they "[lay] it at the apostles feet" (Acts 5:2).

Peter observes that they are not being entirely honest and have kept part of the profit for themselves, instead of giving all they had, like they are implying. He confronts Ananias,asking, "Why hath Satan filled thing heart to lie to the Holy Ghost, and to keep back part of the price of the land? While it remained,was it not thine own? After it was sold, was it not in thine own power? Why hast thou conceived this thing in thine heart? Thou hast not lied unto men, but unto God." (3,4). After Peter's confrontation, Ananias, overcome by the guilt and fear of his actions, dies. His wife, Sapphira, is also confronted by Peter, and shortly after, also dies out of fear and shame.

So....what exactly is this story trying to teach us here? Seems kind of intense, right? Here's some thoughts after reading:

• God cares about the condition of our hearts
• God wants all of our heart, wants us to willingly come to Him
• Ananias and Sapphira's shame/fear caused them to "give up the ghost"
• Our shame/fear cut us off from God

Bottom line, God loves us all individually. He gave His only perfect Son so that all of us can live with Him again, He gave us our bodies, our spirits, our families- everything we have is because of Him. The only thing He cannot take by force and that He does not already own is our hearts. So all He asks in return for all He does is that we love him with all of our heart, might, mind, and strength. And even then, that is for our own good, so that we qualify for eternal life and are prepared to live joyfully in this life and in the next. Everything He does is to help us progress and to be the happiest we can be.

So why was Ananias and Sapphira's offering not enough? Why did Peter chew them out for holding on to some of the extra profit? It was because their hearts were not completely dedicated to God- their hearts were not willing to give him everything they had. Christ tells us: "And ye shall offer up unto me no more the shedding of blood; yea your sacrifices and your burnt offerings shall be done away, for I will accept none of your sacrifices and your burnt offerings. And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit." (3 Nephi 9:9,20) It wasn't about the money they were withholding- it was the fact that they were not willing to give God all of their hearts.

There are so many other examples in the scriptures that illustrate this concept: Cain's offering not being what God instructed and also being evil because of the condition of his heart, the pharisees not giving as much as the widow and her two mites because they were not giving all they had, the rich young ruler who could not part with his possessions when asking what more he could do, etc.

Also, I found it interesting that once confronted with their decision, both Ananias and his wife, Sapphira "gave up the ghost." (Acts 5:5, 10). It doesn't say that God struck them down or punished them for their behavior- they both forfeited the will to live. Whether it was because of overwhelming shame or fear of what would happen to them, it doesn't specify in the chapter- but I feel the point of including their deaths shows us what will happen spiritually to each of us when we choose not to give all of our hearts to God. When we choose to give into shame or fear over what we've done, we distance ourselves from God, intentionally or unintentionally. When we choose not to give all we have to him, we intentionally cut ourselves off from his presence, spiritually dying as we withhold parts of ourselves from him.

So where are you holding back? What parts of your heart are you not giving to God right now? The wonderful thing is, once we recognize we are with holding, we have the capacity to change, no matter how hard it is. I know that God loves you and is so proud of all you are doing. I know He loves each of us and that everything He does is to help us here in mortality, and especially in the life to come. I hope you have a great week!

Emily  

Rise Up and Walk

Great study today relating to my focus last week on turning weaknesses into strengths!

In chapter 3 of Acts, Peter and John come across a man lame since birth. This man spends his time begging for money and food in front of the temple to earn a living. As Peter and John draw closer, they tell him to look at them and focus on what they say. He turns his attention to them, "expecting to receive something of them," (5) which I'm guessing means he expects money from them to help him get food later on. 

Instead of providing this man with what he thinks he needs, Peter and John give him something far greater: the ability to walk. This man has never had the capacity to walk, and I'm guessing, in turn, has not had the opportunity to rely on his own strength to care for himself. Peter tells the man he has no money to give, "but such as I have give I thee: In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth rise up and walk." (6) What happens next is incredible, "And he took him by the right hand, and lifted him up: and immediately his feet and ankle bones received strength. And he leaping up stood, and walked, and entered with them into the temple, walking, leaping, and praising God." (6-8)

What just happened here? This man, who has not ever had the ability to walk has been changed in an instant. His whole life has been influenced by this weakness, from not being able to get himself where he needs to go on his own, to not being able to support himself (hence the begging in front of the temple). Instead of giving him the money he wants to buy himself food and help him survive, Peter and John provide a way for him to provide for himself by granting him the ability to walk. I feel like this story is a beautiful way of demonstrating Christ's capacity to turn our weaknesses into strengths.

Without Christ's help, we are like this man, unable to walk on our own and limited in our resources and ability to progress. However, with Christ's help, we are granted the capacity to walk, or to have our weaknesses turned into strengths. Looking at walking symbolically, there is so much power that comes with what that entails. When we have the ability to walk, we can choose our path- whether we take steps to draw closer to God, or whether we will choose to walk away from him. When we are unable to walk (again, symbolically) we are stuck and our progression is hindered.

I love that Christ wants us to walk on our own. He wants us to willingly choose to follow him, to give our weaknesses to him and willingly live in a way that we can return to the presence of God.

Great study- I'm very grateful for what I learned today.

I hope you have a great week!

Much love,

Emily

That Ye May Be the Children of Your Father which is in Heaven

Matthew 5

All of the examples Christ gives imply that he is not just looking at your outward actions, but he is looking at the condition of your heart

-"Ye have heard it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be danger of the judgement. But I say unto you whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgement" (Matthew 5:21-22)

-"Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time: Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart." (27-28)

So why does that matter? Why does it matter what your heart, thoughts, and inner workings are?

From what I gather, it all comes down to who you are and who you will become. Actions are based off of internal thoughts, beliefs, and where your heart is. If you are angry or upset with someone internally, even if you treat them well externally, you are only doing yourself damage in the long run. Eventually, your true inner feelings will come out, one way or anther, whether it's through a snarky, rude remark, the way you treat them (intentionally or unintentionally, etc), or anything else, you are the one who suffers most on the inside.

Why is it important to learn to treat ALL (not just those who are kind to you, but everyone) with respect?

Christ says that if we are really to be the light of the world (following his example) we need to treat others the way God treats them. Why? 

"That ye may be the children of your Father which is in Heaven: for maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good and sendeth rain to the just and on the unjust."

"For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? Be ye therefore perfect, even as your father in Heaven." (45-48)

Looking at the Greek translation of perfect gives us "teleos." According to the Greek translation, there are three main ideas associated with this word:

1. that which is complete — which contains all the requisite parts.

2. that which is so good that nothing of the kind could be better.

3. that which has attained its purpose.

So looking at being perfect like God indicates that we are complete and have the capacity to still feel the whole spectrum of human emotions (think of Enoch seeing God weep). I feel, the biggest difference between us and God at this point, is that because He is a complete (perfected) immortal Being, He has a full understanding of how to appropriately express His emotions. That doesn't mean He still doesn't feel anger, disappointment, grief, pain, discouragement and sadness. It means that His love for us is also complete (perfect), which allows Him to look beyond our flaws, mistakes, and weaknesses, and allows Him to help us become the best we can be.

If we are to become like our Father in Heaven, the best way to do that is to follow the perfect example of Christ, who is the light of the world. As we follow His example and become like Him, we will shine that good old light as well.

Some others reasons to learn to become like God:

-Preparing us to be earthly parents one day- learning to love and respect your children even when they act against your beliefs

-Preparing to be Heavenly Parents one day

I think reading this chapter overall reminded me the importance of checking my motivations, emotions, and actions on a consistent basis. I know I still have a lot of work to do with keeping my emotions in check, and I know that one of my weaknesses that I want to improve on is making sure I don't let my emotions cloud reality (like getting anxious or frustrated or upset over an issue that is not really as big a deal that I think it is).

I'm grateful for the chance to improve my weaknesses through God's help, and by doing so, improve my relationships with those around me. Hope you have a great day!

Emlily

"Then Will I Make Weak Things Become Strong"

Hey howdy hey. It's been a while. I'm excited to be back.

I'm focusing on the theme of Christ's promise to turn weaknesses into strengths- and I am loving it. Lately I feel like I've been doing pretty poorly in a lot of areas of my life- work, school, friends, helping my direct community, as well as those around the world, calling, and painting, just to name a few. I think it's all part of being human, but it has been quite a difficult balance trying to figure out how to give my best in all, not just some areas of my life. And it's hard to know where to exactly focus your time and energy when there are so many things demanding your attention (which I know goes for the whole human family- not just me). Also, with all of the events going on in the world, locally and globally, it can be really discouraging as whole to feel like anything you do can make a difference.

Despite all these overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, inadequacy, and concern for how on earth I can help and how I'm supposed to get everything done, I feel like through sincere prayer and some great scripture study, I'm slowly learning (or relearning, rather) how giving it all to Christ makes all the difference. Although we may be weighed down by our own weaknesses, or the weaknesses of others, we are promised by Christ and by a few of his disciples that with his help, our weaknesses can become the best part of ourselves.

"If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace if sufficient...for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong..." Ether 12:27

How beautiful is that?

I love the idea of taking something seen as negative and converting it to a positive. I love that Christ doesn't demand that you acquire a new personality, or that you act just like such and such down the road- all he requires is that you open your heart to him and he can help you see the gifts of your imperfections (that's right, just referenced good old Brene Brown). Often, our weaknesses are simply strengths that have been warped in an unhealthy way. As Christ states in that scripture up above, "I give unto men weakness that they may be humble..." He gives us weaknesses to help us grow. To help us empathize, and most importantly, to help us draw closer to him. If we can look at our weaknesses not as trials, but as gifts and chances for us to grow, we will learn far more about how to better love and respect ourselves, as well as the world around us.

This idea is also shared by Debbie Ford, author of Dark Side of the Light Chasers (great book if you're looking for something new to read). Basically, she emphasizes that we all have a "light shadow" (our strengths) and a "dark shadow" (our shortcomings, imperfections, weaknesses). These two shadows work to balance each other, and when we embrace both, we are able to more fully practice self compassion, forgiveness, and love, which in turn we can share with others around us. Ford encourages us to see that our dark shadow, our weaknesses, are merely opportunities for us to find new strengths. Someone might point out that you're blunt, which you see as a weakness of being mean. However, if you look at how it can potentially turn into a strength, like allowing you to be honest and open with others, which means others know you are trustworthy, reliable, and capable of communicating effectively, with Christ's help you can turn your weaknesses into some of the best parts about yourself.

Other quick thoughts:

Ether 12:27

• Weaknesses keep us humble
• Humility turns us to God, thru God weaknesses are strong
• Find the gifts of your imperfections!

Phillipians 4:13

• Testimony of Christ can help us through moments of personal doubt/frustration

Alma 26:12

• Recognizing where you've been helps you to keep progressing
• Gratitude for God's strength allows you to help others

I loved this study and I look forward to learning more! Hope you're having a lovely week!

Emily

Weekend Reflection

This weekend was wonderful. Lots of family time, spending time with friends, pondering, evaluating, and inspiration all around. Hopefully I'll be able to connect it all- I'm just going to share what's been on my mind over the weekend.

I was at the temple on Friday for a family member who made the decision to be endowed and it was incredible. I remember as I walked into the chapel of the temple to wait for the endowment session to start, I watched as multiple members of my immediate and extended family walked in. I was overwhelmed by how many members of my family who had come to support this wonderful event. None of them had to come, or were forced, but each one of them took the time out of their schedule to show their love and respect for this decision. I remember feeling so much love, so much peace, and feeling that this is what it will be like in the next life. No judgement for past choices. No impatience at the timing of others. Just happiness, relief, joy, love, and unity.

I then realized that I'd been missing out on a critical part of temple worship. I try to go to the temple on my own as often as I can- some months I'm much better at it than others. I tend to go on my own, and occasionally with other family or friends. Then I realized it is very important to attend the temple as often as you can on your own, to learn and grow at your own rate-  but everything about the temple- about the gospel- is about helping us progress as families. That doesn't mean everyone in your family will progress at the same rate. Or that they will choose to work towards the same end goal as you at all. But it does mean that as you attend the temple and seek to better yourself, your influence will naturally be felt among those closest to you. And progressing with family doesn't mean it will always be those you are related to by birth. Family can be the bonds you form with friends and other loved ones in your life. Anywhosers, bottom line is- we are not in this alone. God wants us to all progress together while we are here on earth, helping each other along the way on our own individual adventures.

Other thoughts from the weekend:

• Life doesn't always go the way YOU plan. Be flexible
• Wounds don't mean you have done anything wrong or that you are unloved
• They can make you more empathetic, remind you of where you've been
• Understanding comes with time, consistency, effort, and patience
• Trust that answers come as you are willing to ACT
• Darkness helps us better appreciate the light
• Life beats you down again and again
• With Christ we have the capacity to change and get back up again
• Being open hurts and can be scary, but it is the only way to fully live
• If your jersey isn't muddy, sweaty, or torn, you're not playing the game
• Learn from my mistakes and weaknesses- GROW
• They're only negative if I let them weigh me down
• Be the kind of person that is willing to admit when they are wrong and quick to change for the better
• Fear hinders progression
• Understand, acknowledge, face fears, and ACT
• Trust in the Lord with ALL thine heart

So I think what it all comes down to from what I learned this weekend is that God loves us all individually, he wants us to progress at our own pace (in His time and the time that works best for us), our progression is best when we help others along the way, we are meant to progress as families (blood, friends, etc), and as we trust in Christ and his gospel we can accomplish anything, overcome any trial, temptation, or weakness, and be our best selves. And we are not in it alone.

Hope you have a great day!

Emily

Cast the Net on the Right and Ye Shall Find

A lot of what I do and think is based off of fear. What am I afraid of?

• Rejection
• Isolation
• Too broken or messed up to be loved
• Letting myself down
• Letting others down
• Living below my potential
• Rising to my potential (I am afraid to shine)
• Ridicule from others
• That one day I'll wake up and all be gone
• That I am not a priority 
• Being hurt
• Hurting others through my own weaknesses and shortcomings
• Regressing or reverting to old habits

I loved my study today. In John, chapter 21, Christ appears for the 3rd time since his resurrection to Peter and a few other apostles. Peter has reverted to the life he lived prior to meeting Christ. After a long night of nothing caught in their nets, Peter and crew are about to turn in, when someone from the shore calls out, "Cast the net on the right side and ye shall find." (John 21:6) Taking a step back from the story, what stuck out most to you about this phrase? When I first read it, I didn't think about what Christ physically meant- that if they put their net on the right side of the boat instead of the left, they would find the fish they were looking for. I thought more along the lines of center your focus, heart, mind, and soul in the right place and ye shall find.
Where are we looking for happiness right now? Are we following God's counsel and looking where he has directed us? Or are we certain that we know better, ignoring His council and trying to find happiness, success, whatever it may be, in the wrong places? Just some food for thought.

Back to the chapter: once Peter and friends drop their nets onto the right side of the boat, they do indeed catch more fish than they anticipated. John recognizes this as the first miracle Christ performed for them back in the day and once the others catch on, they immediately make their way to shore. The follow thoughts came to me as I continued reading:

• When we follow God's counsel on where to look for success, happiness, etc, we will be more abundantly blessed than we can ever imagine
• We need to be willing to listen and ACT on given counsel
• God will bless us appropriate to our needs and natural capacities
• Nets remained intact, did not break despite how many fish were carried
• Perspective is everything
• Peter could've looked at all the fish as a burden
• They're too heavy, we don't need this many, we don't deserve them
• Why did you give us so many?
• Instead, he saw them as a blessing from the Lord
• When Christ keeps asking Peter, "Lovest thou me more than these?" he wasn't looking for words alone, he was looking for a commitment to act
• Feed my sheep => Call to action! Show, not tell!
• Christ foretells of Peter's martyrdom, Peter asks what John's fate will be
• Christ tells him, "If I will that he tarry until I come, what is it to thee?" 
• Don't get caught up in other people's strengths, talents, or role that you forget or downplay your own
• We all have unique gifts and talents specific to US
• Hone our skills, understand our roles- don't be distracted or discouraged that they aren't the same as others around us

When we let go of what we think we're supposed to be, we can start living. I don't think Peter had fully recognized who he was going to become yet, or even who he was at this point. But Christ guided him to where he needed to focus in order to reach his highest potential.

I'm sure he was filled with just as many, if not more fears than I have right now. But he didn't let his fears control his actions. He learned from his past mistakes, he listened with an open and humble heart, and he ACTED. He became one of the most incredible apostles ever recorded in the scriptures, and one of my favorite examples to follow. I love that Peter kept trying despite his mistakes. I love that he kept doing his best regardless of his weaknesses and shortcomings. I know that even though I have a lot of fears swarming around for a number of reasons, as I center my heart on Christ, all will be well. It doesn't mean things will be easy, but I know that I can do anything with his help. I'm so grateful for the love, hope, and healing he has already provided me in my life and I know that with his help I will continue to progress and learn while I am here on earth.

I love you so much and hope you have a great day!

Emily

Discovering Divinity Within

Man oh man- I loved my study today! I'm catching up on the conference talks I missed- and good gravy, I am learning heaps and heaps- and I've only just started! I can't wait for the rest.

Today I read Sister Wixom's talk, titled, "Discovering the Divinity Within". She tells us that our Divine Nature- the capacity to become like God- comes straight from our Heavenly Father Himself. It is not dependent on the clothes we wear, our social status, our education, our popularity, or any other aspect of our mortal definition of self worth. Our Divine Nature never changes. We will always be children of God, no matter what mistakes we make, experiences we go through, and change that occurs in this life. Our Divine Nature is constant.

I love that part of our Divine Nature is the capacity to change. Sometimes we change for the better, while other times we regress or change for the worse. No matter what though- we will always have the opportunity to progress through the changes we decide to make while here in mortality. Our journey here is all about progression, and more importantly, learning how to live in a way that will prepare us to continue progressing eternally.

Something that really stuck out to me as I read Sister Wixcom's thoughts on this subject was the example she used of the process of birth. Honestly, that's something that has terrified me for a long time, and I still am not 100% sure how I feel about it- but as I read over her words, I was impressed by the way it can relate to other relationships in life. Before a baby is born, the only way for it to survive and continue growing is by borrowing from the mother's life force. The mother and baby are connected in a way that absolutely no other relationship can replicate- they are literally part of each other for nine months. One connection, the umbilical cord, allows the baby to receive the proper nourishment it needs to continue to function and grow, preparing it to one day leave the mother's womb.
Once the baby is born, this connection is severed. Why is it necessary to cut this life source off as soon as the baby is out and breathing? In order for the baby to grow into an adult one day and "live to fulfill the measure of its creation," (President Uchtdorf), it cannot survive off the umbilical cord anymore. That connection was appropriate for the baby's time spent in the womb, but if the mother or the baby attempt to keep this connection going now, both will end up in an unhealthy situation.
The baby will still need the mother to aid with giving life through breastfeeding and other forms of caretaking, but now the baby is preparing to one day sustain itself and become independent from the mother's care.

That doesn't mean they won't be a part of each other's lives anymore. It just means that they are growing together. In order for both of them to progress, there will be painful, yet necessary changes each must go through in order to reach their full potential.

Towards the end of her talk, Sister Wixcom tells of a drought in Ethiopia during the 1980s, in which people had to walk miles and miles to get to the nearest relief station with food, water, and other aid. An old man, on his way to one of the relief stations, heard a baby crying and found it alone with it's mother who had recently passed away due to the drought. The old man scooped the baby up, and after walking for 25 miles, arrived at a station where both he and the baby could be cared for. Instead of seeking relief for himself, the first question he asked was, "What can be done for the baby?"
He recognized that he had the capacity to wait a little longer for his nourishment, but this baby needed immediate attention in order for it to grow in the long run.

We will all be different aspects of these people throughout our lives. At one point, we have all been a baby, struggling to survive on our own without the help of countless others. We relied on the kindness and sacrifices of family, friends, and sometimes, even strangers to help us survive. As we grow, we have the opportunity to be mothers (in the metaphorical or physical sense)- capable of caring, nurturing, and helping others grow who are unable to on their own. And we will all one day be the old man, who recognized he too was once that little baby, and be willing to carry those who are unable to carry themselves for the time being.

The thing I love about each of these instances is that none of us is left alone. Sure we will go through different phases and grow in different ways throughout our lives, but there will always be someone to help us through it- or we will be doing the helping. When the mother passed away and wasn't able to carry her child to the relief station, the old man was there to carry the baby the rest of the way. When the baby is old enough, it will one day play a role in helping others around it when the time comes.

God knows each of his children. We are all born with the potential to become like him. As we grow and progress here in mortality, we will need help from others, we will need to give help to others, and we will become more like our Father in Heaven and recognize the Divine Nature in others around us as we strive to see it within ourselves.

Loved the study and hope you have a great day!
Emily

Be Not Afraid: Only Believe

Christ on trial with Pilate.

• Pilate fears what the people are saying and how they will react to his initial sentence- he wants to let Christ go
• Doesn't follow his gut and gives into what people around him want
• Tries to tell Christ that he is in control, he has the power to spare his life
• "Speakest thou not unto me? Knowest thou not that I have power to crucify thee and I have power to release thee?" (John 19:10)
• Christ knows God is in charge, knows his potential and his role as the savior
• This knowledge allows him the ability to reject the temptation to take the easy way out
• "Thou couldest have no power at all against me, except it were given thee from above..." (John 19:11)

True, Christ, could have accepted this way out and blown off his eternal identity.
Why did he reject Pilate's statement and allow himself to be wrongly accused?

• Understood His role as savior
• Necessary to allow these terrible things to happen to accomplish his purpose: completing the atonement
• Understood everything comes back to God
• Couldn't accomplish the atonement without the Father
• Couldn't reach his highest potential or anyone else achieve theirs without the help of the Father

So remembering our eternal identities will allow us the ability to overcome any weakness, temptation, or trial. Knowledge is power!

Pilate gives into FEAR- fear of man and chooses to crucify Christ instead of releasing him, even though his intuition tells him that there is nothing wrong with Christ. Why do we do that? Even when we know the truth, why do we do want we know is wrong?

So much comes back to FEAR. Because Pilate was afraid of how the public would perceive him, he choose to act on that fear and convict Christ even though he knew he was innocent. We do the same thing when we understand or know that what we are doing is wrong, but because of fear, we do it anyway. Whether it's fear of rejection, fear of messing up, fear of disappointing- whatever it may be fear is unhealthy when it prevents us from acting on truth. Fear can be an important teaching tool (we are afraid of some things, like sharks, to keep us safe and help us survive). But when we allow our fears to dictate our actions and negatively impact our behavior, that's when it becomes dangerous.

I think that's why Christ said time and time again in the scriptures: "Fear not, or Be not afraid, only believe." He recognizes that acting on fear will prevent us from drawing closer to God and from achieving our highest potential. Much like Peter, or Pilate, or many others who loose sight of the bigger picture because of fear, we too will stumble and loose our way. But the beautiful thing is that it all starts with the belief that we can make it back to God. We can change our behavior- if we choose to believe we can.

When we believe we can change through Christ, we are given strength and power beyond our natural capacity to make the changes we want to in our lives. I loved Christ's example- not just in this instance with Pilate- but honestly throughout his whole life- that if we choose faith over fear, we can accomplish anything that the Father asks of us. Christ always points us back to Heavenly Father, in all he says and in all he does. If we take the time to get to know Christ's example better, we will come to want to deepen our own understanding and our own relationship with God. Loved this study. Hope you have a great day!

Emily

Following the Peter

Just some questions before my study this fine day:
How do I improve on increasing my love and understanding for others?
How do I improve my ability to complete tasks?
How can I increase my own integrity?

After reading for a bit in John 18, I feel like I was drawn to Peter and thought more about the broader picture of his entire experience as a disciple and apostle of Christ. At this point in chapter 18, Christ is being tried as Peter watches on from the shadows. When asked if he was one of Christ's disciples, he immediately denied it and tried to hide. Twice more, a few people pointed out that they'd even seen him with Chris in the garden that night. Still determined not to reveal his association with Christ, he fulfills the prophecy made earlier that night that he would deny Christ 3 times before the sun came up.

Why would Peter have acted this way when he and Christ had been through so much together? He was probably traumatized from his act of violence in the garden, just witnessed his close friend be taken away, probably felt helpless and hopeless and upset at himself for not doing more to save him, terrified at what was going to happen to Christ, as well as what was going to happen to him and the others disciples, furious at Judas for betraying Christ, and probably many other emotions going on. He was panicking, and probably just went into survival mode at this point. He was just trying to make it through the night.

So why would Christ forgive Peter after denying him like that? Christ understood where he was coming from. He knew why Peter was acting that way, and he understood that Peter was acting out of fear, among some other choice emotions.

• What does Christ see in Peter?
• Sees his full potential to become one of the greatest apostles one day
• A willing learner
• Humble
• Was the journey to becoming the Peter of Acts perfect? Heck to the no!
• Was rebuked multiple times by Christ
• Went back to his old life/habits after Christ was crucified
• Sank when walking on the water
• Denied knowing Christ 3 different times
• Didn't believe the women when Christ was resurrected
• Do any of these experiences make him any less valuable? No!
• These experiences shaped Peter into the apostle Christ needed
• He is still loved despite his weaknesses and his love for Christ is all the stronger

That's how Christ is able to love, forgive, and exercise compassion on each one of us. He can see who we can become without getting angry or upset at our journey there. He understands that we will fall over and over. He knows that we will act out of fear and misunderstanding a lot of the time. He does not expect perfection. He expects us to learn from our mistakes and become the best version of ourselves through his atoning sacrifice.
Sometimes we are Peter and we are just getting by. We are terrified and feel hopeless and distraught about our circumstances, which causes us to act out of fear and basically throws us into survival mode. We make mistakes that sometimes hurt others along the way. But as we come to more fully understand Christ's role in our lives, we are able to change our behavior and reach our highest potential. We develop the ability to follow through on our commitments, reach our goals, and increase our individual integrity as we more fully welcome the redeeming and enabling power of the atonement of Christ daily in our lives.
Don't loose sight of where you've been. You have done amazing things and overcome incredible obstacles. Much like Peter, there will be times where we will all fall again and again. But as long as we choose to get back up, Christ will help us gradually become the best we can be.

I love you and hope you have a great day!
Emily

Put Up Thy Sword

How do I increase my capacity to exercise patience, love, and understanding with others?
How can I consciously ACT and not REACT (act and not be acted upon)?
When I increase my own sense of self worth and understand my own identity as a daughter of God, all else will follow:

• Acknowledge that I make mistakes, both intentionally and unintentionally
• Acknowledge that other people make mistakes as well. Do not condemn them
• Recognize what I need to change in my own life
• Practice forgiveness and compassion on myself = will do the same for others

How does Christ treat those around him?
In John 18, Christ is in the Garden with his disciples and they are confronted by a mob of not so happy men. When Christ asks who they are looking for, they reply Jesus of Nazareth. Christ tells them who he is and is ready to be taken, but before anything is done, Peter draws his sword and cuts of the ear of the nearest mob man:

"Then Simon Peter having a sword drew it, and smote the nigh priest's servant, and cut off his right ear. The servant's name was Malchus. Then Jesus said to Peter, Put up thy sword into the sheath: the cup which my Father hath given me, shall I not drink it?" John 18:10&11

Hold up. Christ just spent the last few hours suffering for the sins of the world. He had been through hell and back, and now one of his disciples is handing him over to a mob. He knows what is about to happen. He knows he is about to give up his own life to fulfill his purpose as the savior of the world. He has every right in this moment to be frustrated, angry, terrified, and honestly, past feeling about how everyone else is feeling and reacting. There are so many reasons he could just start yelling or fighting physically- but instead, he chooses to focus on what is happening with Peter and this Malchus guy. He chooses to teach them both the power of forgiveness, mercy, and compassion. He teaches them to reach outward and to ACT instead of react.

How often do we act like Peter and get caught up in the heat of the moment with our limited perspective? From Peter's point of view, he was doing the right thing. He was taking action to make sure that Christ would not be captured or harmed. He did not see anything wrong with his behavior, and I'm sure  he was shocked to hear Christ tell him to put his weapon away and watch him heal the same man that was there to capture him.

There are plenty of instances where we intentionally or unintentionally cause harm to someone else through our own "swords", whether it's words, actions, or any other negative behavior. We wound those around us with the thought that we are making things right, when in reality, we don't understand the greater picture. Peter thought he was saving Christ by attacking Malchus, but he didn't understand that Christ had to submit to these men to fulfill his purpose. Peter's reaction caused Malchus extreme physical harm. It seems like Malchus was just a guy in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and suffered because of Peter's choice. Although he was negatively affected by Peter's actions, through Christ, he was able to experience the healing that he needed in way a that changed his life. We too can experience Christ's love and mercy. We can be forgiven when we harm others, and also experience the healing power of his atonement when others do us wrong as well.

It's important for each of us to acknowledge that we do not have the whole picture on anything AT ALL. We only have a limited perspective, and when we recognize that, we are able to step back and change our behavior. We will develop the capacity to reach outward, like Christ does, and put up our sword(s) into [our] sheath. That doesn't mean that we will not be required to stand up for ourselves on occasion- but it means that we will develop the ability to understand when to speak, and when not to speak. We will develop the ability to know when we need to defend ourselves and when we need to let things be. We will understand that we don't know everything about the people around us or what God may have in store. We will understand our own capability to act and not be acted upon.

I really really enjoyed this study today and hope you have a fantastic week!
Much love,
Emily

God's Gifts

After hearing about the passing of Elder Scott, I decided I wanted to read some wise words from one of my favorite general authorities. I sure do love the insights and love he shares whenever he speaks! I was scrolling through a number of his talks and the title that stuck out most to me was "Making the Right Choices." From what I gathered, this talk was aimed specifically at young men, mostly hitting on the importance of the Law of Chastity. Even thought I am definitely not the intended audience, I feel like I learned a ton- not just about the Law of Chastity specifically, but about how a lot of the principles he emphasized can apply to so many other areas of life as well. Love how that gospel connects erry where. Yes indeed. After reading this talk, I realized that it all connects because God loves us. He gave us each a body, this earth, commandments, and a savior- all because He loves us individually and wants us to become the best version of ourselves.

So real quick review, why is it important we live the Law of Chastity?

• Allows us to be part of bringing God's children to earth
• We help bring another human being to this planet. That is so much power and responsibility!! Seriously, I am amazed at how incredible it is that we have the capacity to create another human being. Wowzas
• Connects husband and wife emotionally, physically, spiritually
• Strengthens relationship with each other on each level
• Ties family together as a whole when practiced in a safe, respectful, and loving environment

What happens when we don't live this law or when someone else's disregard for it affects us?

• Emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual scarring can occur
• Fear can damage ability to have a healthy, proper relationship further down the road
• Our ability to feel the spirit diminishes as we embrace only feeding those emotions
• Sexual emotions and feelings are not bad. It is only negative when we allow them to dictate our behavior and our hearts with no control or regard to how it affects us and others in our lives
• Seek to individually understand your own personal boundaries and the boundaries God has set

Some of the PRINCIPLES (which apply to ANY area of life) that stuck out most to me were:

• Our relationship with God should always be first
• Improve relationship with God= improve relationship with everyone else
• "The more obedient you are...the more the Lord can help you overcome temptation"
• Temptation to turn away from God
• Temptation to give up when things are hard
• Temptation to look the other way when something is wrong
• Temptation to be passive
• Temptation to ignore other's pain/discomfort
• Temptation to willingly disobey
• Temptation to remain silent
• Temptation to give into fear
• He can help over come any, all , or even more of these temptations. What a guy
• Avoid compromising my beliefs to be accepted by others
• When your heart, head, and actions are not aligned, misery follows (based off personal experience, yo)
• When it comes to self destructive behavior, replacement is necessary
• Replace negative for a positive
• For example: Negative thoughts (I'm a bad person, I'm an idiot, I'll never get this right, so and so is so much smarter than me, I'm not good enough, smart enough, good looking enough, not witty enough, not cultured enough, I'm too loud, too spazzy, too stupid, I'm too slow at this, etc)
• Replace with Positive Thoughts (I made a mistake, but I will do better next time: That wasn't my best, but with more practice I'll get the hang of it: I don't understand it now, but with more time, it'll come: I am enough, etc)
• Keeping the commandments individually (like the law of chastity or any other commandment that involves controlling our mortal cravings and appetites) allows us to become
• More self compassionate, more self confident, more self reliant, more patient, understanding, etc.
• Allows us to practice those attributes to others (more forgiving, loving, respectful of others when we respect ourselves

"Consistent, willing obedience increases confidence and ability. It produces character and allows you to face difficult challenges and overcome them. It qualifies you to receive inspiration and power from the Lord."

I am so grateful for my study today. I feel like it really helped me connect the importance of keeping all of the commandments to the best of our ability- not just the ones we like or the ones we're already "good" at- but really seeking to understand the why behind the ones we may feel don't make as much sense to us. It all comes down to God's love for us as His children. We've each received a body from Him, with an unlimited capacity to impact the world around us. So many of the commandments help us care for our physical body, as well as for the spiritual aspect of ourselves.

I feel like I've taken these gifts for granted- 1. That I have a body and 2. That embracing the commandments more fully in my life will help me better care for my body. I've been a little grumpy (ok a lot grumpy) lately with a lot of different medical issues going on- from a continually worsening frozen shoulder (which creates a lot of pain in both shoulders and my neck), to migraines, constant fatigue, scoliosis, painful knees and neck, TMJ, and other issues- but when it all comes down to it, I am amazed by the wonderful body God has given me.

I am grateful for the chance I have to walk, run, dance, sing, laugh, cry, feel pain, feel joy, connect with others, paint, see, hear, touch, and truly enjoy my experience here on earth. I am grateful for my two legs that get me where I need to be, my feet that support me on all of my adventures, my hands that create, care, love, inspire, build, and feel the world around me. I am grateful that I can see with both my eyes, that I can hear with both my hears, that I can taste all the wonderful (and disgusting) foods there are to taste, that I can smell all the skunks, lawns, pine trees, pools, peppermint, apples, lavender, rosemary, rainstorms and plantains that I fancy. I am grateful for my ability to process my emotions, to empathize with others, to reflect on my own life, and express my inner workings through writing and painting. I am grateful for this body, my body.

I know that God made it for me and loves me, despite my weaknesses and imperfections, physically and emotionally. I know that I am so fortunate to have the body that I do. I don't want to take this gift for granted, and I want to be better at expressing my gratitude for it through the way I live on a day to daily basis. I know He shows us love for us in everything He does- giving us our bodies, sharing commandments with us to allow us to progress and be the best version of ourselves, and providing us with a savior for when we make mistakes and to enable us to become the best we can be. I want to SHOW God I am grateful for these gifts- not just tell Him. I want to show Him that I am grateful for His love and that I love Him through how I live. I know that I can do it as I try my best day by day with His help. 

I love you so so much and I am so glad for this study!

Much love,

Emmaline

Inner Ramblings

I feel kind of scattered today- but I hope something in what I share makes a beet of sense. I feel like this last year was an important way for me to learn the value of my own voice. I learned how to say no, how to say yes, how to bring up if I am uncomfortable, how to discuss my feelings as a whole and value my opinion, as well as the opinion of others. I feel like now that I've come to understand that more, it's time for me to learn the importance of not just telling, but showing how and what I feel. I feel it's important to not just tell God that I am willing to improve myself, but to show Him I really mean it. So here's a few questions:
How can I better align my actions with my words? How can I make lasting changes that will draw me closer to Him? And how can I treat others with this same respect and love? Telling AND showing. Show and tell, if you will.

"Forasmuch as this people draw near me with their mouth, and with their lips do honour me, but have removed their heart far from me, and their fear toward me is taught by the precept of men." (Isaiah 29:13)

So where does it all start?

• Recognizing our love should always be directed at God first, then we will naturally love our fellow man
• Saying you want to change and actually putting those words into action are two different things
• Fear of man separates our heart from God
• Work on our relationship individually with Heavenly Father and Christ=all else follows
• Being grateful for our own circumstances allows us to have joy in the success of others

How do I SHOW God my love for Heavenly Father?
-TALKING with Him through prayer
-Taking time to read the scriptures
-Recording my day (drawing a picture or writing)
-Asking for help/receiving it
-Asking who I can help
-Gratitude- saying thank you to Him and everyone else around me
-Turning outward and looking for opportunities to serve - GIVING BACK

I think that is one that I want to work on-giving back. Or paying it forward. Whatever you want to call it. I get so wrapped up in school, work, and other areas of life that I forget to pay attention to my family, friends, and strangers around me that may need a little something extra, like a smile, someone to listen to them, or what not. I know more often than not, no matter how perfect or happy someone may appear, there is usually something else going on underneath the surface. I have learned that through my own trials, as well as observing friends and loved ones through out my life.

So what am I going to do with what God has taught me?
How am I going to show Him I love Him for all He has done for me and all He has helped me with? I feel focusing more on gratitude for what I have, for who is in my life, and paying it all forward is a great place to start.

Have I done any good in the world today?

Have I done any good in the world today? 
Have I helped anyone in need? 
Have I cheered up the sad and made someone feel glad? 
If not I have failed indeed. 
Has anyone's burden been lighter today 
Because I was willing to share?
Have the sick and the weary been helped on their way?
When they needed my help was I there?

Then wake up and do something more
Than dream of your mansions above

That just popped into my head- I feel like it adequately sums up what I'm feeling right now. If we humbly let God know that we are willing to serve, He will guide us to those who need our light and also guide us to those we need. I know that He is mindful of everything we are feeling and experiencing. I know that we all have the capacity to feel His love because each of us matters to Him. I know that as we show our love for God through our words and actions, we will be allowed to help others around us through their journeys. It's not just about us as individuals- it's about us all as individuals of the human family. We are here to help each other out and make this journey all the better for it.
I don't know if you've seen Me, Earl, and the Dying Girl at all (it is a beautiful movie, I highly recommend it!!) but I watched it again recently and loved so many of the messages it shared. One of my favorites was the transformation that takes place through service. I don't want to give too much of the movie away- so I'll just say that I was deeply moved by the role service played in the protagonist's life as the movie unfolds. I also loved that it stressed the importance of human connection. We can try all we want to numb ourselves through various methods in order to avoid pain and heartache- whether it's hiding behind humor, pretending like we don't care, keeping up appearances, or whatever our shield may be- but we are meant to be connected. And when we take the time to do so, yes, there will be times where it is so painful all we can do is run away, or react irrationally, but the changes that come from making deep, lasting, and loving connections is all worth it. Even if it only lasts for a short time.
I am so grateful for all that Heavenly Father has done for me in my life. I'm grateful for the people I've met, the experiences I've had, for the lessons He has taught me. I love you and hope you have a terrific Tuesday!

Much love,
Emily

Spirit Study

How do I deepen my own testimony of the gospel? Where am I right now? Am I comfortable? What can I do differently to draw closer to the spirit? How can I improve my relationship with God/Christ/others around me?

John 16 "For if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you." (7)

Christ was taught by the spirit. He in turn, understands that he is not the one to convert us to his gospel- the spirit is the one and only converter. Christ recognizes that even he, the greatest teacher (in human form) doesn't have the capacity to reach everyone. We have to be willing to receive the spirit and what it wants to share with us. We must be willing to let the spirit into our hearts in order for it to communicate with us fully and effectively.

How does the spirit teach?
Let's take a look at one example in 1 Nephi 11:
Interactive learning- the spirit tells Nephi to look and observe serveral times (verses 8,12, etc)
Asks questions "Nephi, what beholdest thou?" (verses 2,4,10,14,16, etc)
Enables the learner to teach (as part of the question technique)
Allows us to act rather than be acted upon. Pretty great guy if you ask me

Christ recognizes this is the best way to invite people to learn of his gospel. That's why he teaches in parables and has us read, pray, attend church, the temple, etc. It is all about helping each of us learn on our own level.

"Whatsoever ye ask the Father in my name, he will give it unto you." (John 16:23)
"Ask and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."

These things have I spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

So if I want to know how I can better my relationship with God and Christ, I need to:

• Take time to think about what it is I want to learn
• Write down any questions or thoughts I have (writing helps me remember)
• Ask specific questions through prayer
• STUDY the scriptures
• Take notes
• Write down ideas and impressions as I get them
• Stop and think instead of just plowing through
• Think about my questions throughout the day
• Ask other people their insights on the matter
• Pay attention in church and at the temple

There are so many different ways that we are taught by the spirit- find what works for you! What might prevent someone from receiving answers through the spirit/block someone from developing a closer relationship with God and Christ?

• Shame from mistakes
• Embarrassment for not knowing already
• Not believing an answer will come
• Being afraid of the answer
• Being afraid you already know the answer, but it's not the one you want
• Laziness
• Don't know what to do
• Not feeling worthy enough/inadequate  

Improving my relationship with God and Christ through the spirit will help my own personal life, as well as those around me. Lift where I stand and allow the spirit to become an even larger part of my life. A brief, but powerful study today. I am excited to apply what I am learning and hope you have a wonderful week!

Emily

All Enlisted

     The sun is setting over the Nephite city of Judea, bringing to a close another long, exhausting, and discouraging day for the soldiers of Antipus. I can imagine them wilting at their stations along the city walls, their strength giving out but their eyes holding steady, determinedly, to the horizon where at any moment another attack may advance. Their numbers are dwindling day by the day because of the loss of so many of their brethren at the hands of the Lamanite army, and despite their determination, they know that they will not be able to hold out much longer. Most likely, they are all going to die. They know this. For the past several months they have been watching their friends, brothers, fathers, cousins and uncles fall before their eyes and now the groans of the injured being cared for in the city, as well as the cries of widows, join the crickets to make the mournful lullaby of night. Perhaps the thought enters their minds: Was it all for nothing?

"Yea, and they were depressed in body as well as in spirit, for they had fought valiantly by day and toiled by night to maintain their cities... And now they were determined to conquer in this place or die." - Alma 56:16,17

    Why would they stay in that place when all hope seemed to have gone? When it must have appeared as though God Himself had abandoned them? Why didn't the natural instinct of self preservation kick in and send them running for the hills, or at least to another Nephite stronghold where their meager forces might stand a chance alongside a stronger army? What was so important to them that it would keep them "determined to conquer in this place or die"? When I imagine how terrifying it must be to be beyond exhaustion, depressed in body and spirit, having witnessed the death of so many I loved, knowing that I am very likely to meet the same horrifying fate within the next few days, I can't help but wonder: is there anything I would be willing to fight so valiantly and die for?

"Nevertheless, the Nephites were inspired by a better cause, for they were not fighting for monarchy nor power but they were fighting for their homes and their liberties, their wives and their children, and their all, yea, for their rites of worship and their church. And they were doing that which they felt was the duty which they owed to their God; for the Lord had said unto them, and also unto their fathers, that: Inasmuch as ye are not guilty of the first offense, neither the second, ye shall not suffer yourselves to be slain by the hands of your enemies. And again, the Lord has said that: Ye shall defend your families even unto bloodshed. Therefore for this cause were the Nephites contending with the Lamanites, to defend themselves, and their families, and their lands, their country, and their rights, and their religion." - Alma 43:45-47

     It was for these same reasons that Captain Moroni, in chapter 46, rent his coat, wrote on it, fastened it to a pole like a flag, and then rode through the city on his horse, waving it through the air as he called for everyone to join him, "In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children."

     In fact, the Nephites fought so valiantly to protect these things-- their families, their religion, their lands and their freedom-- that even their enemies came to call it the "Cause of the Christians". The army of Antipus held this cause so deeply in their hearts that they were ready to die for it, if need be. I wonder if they questioned why the Lord did not deliver them, or send chariots of fire to assist them in defending so noble a cause. Perhaps they recognized that some are called to be martyrs, such as Abinadi, or so many of their fallen comrades. Though they were depressed in spirit, I wonder if they still held out any hope for victory. Let's get back to them and see how they fare.

     Just at the moment when the end seems to be drawing near, the soldiers of Antipus spy movement in the distance. Their muscles tense in anticipation of another attack. They shout out to one another to prepare. They brace themselves for whatever may come, trying to find within themselves the will to fight. They can feel that what little energy they have left won't be enough. They pray for strength, though so many prayers seem to have gone unheard. And then, like the herald of an angel comes the cry, "It is Helaman! Help has come!"
     Over the hills march a glorious, shining army of 2,000 stripling warriors led by the son of Alma. It is a small band, to be sure, but they appear to be mighty angels in the eyes of Antipus and his men. They are young-- many of them hardly old enough to use a sword-- and they are inexperienced in the ways of battle, but their faith is fresh and bright. They are like warm sunlight and water on the depressed souls they have come to help. Helaman would later write to Moroni, "this little force which I brought with me, yea, those sons of mine, gave [the army of Antipus] great hopes and much joy."- verse 17

   I don't know if it was really sunset when Helaman's army arrived, or even if any of Antipus' men would have recognized him or known who he was. I just like to imagine these things as dramatically as possible, to fully immerse myself in the story. These trifling details aside, the story is still the same. Sometimes in life we get to be the stripling warriors, coming to the aid of others. Sometimes, though, we're like the men of Antipus who struggle to maintain a hopeful, faithful attitude while everything seems to be going wrong and our prayers seem to be going unheard. For me, it can be hard during those times  to remember what is really important or why I'm holding on at all. There are so many things vying for our attention these days, each claiming to be important. As I read through this chapter in the Book of Mormon and asked myself, "What would I be willing to die for?" it came down to two things: my family, and my faith.

     The Cause of the Christians is under attack today every bit as much as it was back then, though it isn't as obvious as a half-naked, face-painted-in-blood, obsidian-sword-wielding Lamanite army marching on our cities. It comes in the subtle form of political correctness, of spirit-numbing entertainment, of "philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men" (Col. 2:8), and "the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive." (Eph. 4:5) It comes under the guise of liberating women from the supposed slave-like labor of rearing children and the glorification of worldly success. It comes in accepting the lusts of the natural man as "normal" and even "healthy".

     If ever there was a cause worth defending to your last breath, it is the one cause that brings true, lasting, eternal joy: the cause of eternal families and the freedom to raise them right.

    Whatever fight we are waging now, be it familial or personal, we can take courage from the faithful attitude of the 2,000 stripling warriors:

     "...Behold, our God is with us, and He will not suffer that we should fall; then let us go forth." - Alma 56:46

Commandments and the Feels

Why do we keep the commandments?

Law of tithing, law of chastity, word of wisdom, prayer, reading scriptures, keeping the sabbath day holy, etc.

"If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love. These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full." John 15: 10,11

Christ tells us what the commandments are and that if we live by them, as intended, not just as a to do list, the joy of the gospel, the light of Christ will more fully be present within us. What does that mean to me?

I feel like joy is far greater and far deeper than just happiness. Happiness to me is simply being satisfied with the moment, but allowing other emotions to take over at a moment's notice. Happiness to me is a surface emotion. But joy on the other hand, is something far greater. It doesn't mean that you are smiling all the time, like I picture when I hear the word happy. Joy indicates gratitude, serenity, peace, and overall acceptance of your life regardless of your surrounding circumstances. Despite all the crazy things that happen to us all, when we are joyful, we are grateful for what we have and who we have in our lives, no matter how much or how little that may be. We have the capacity to express that gratitude to others around us even if we are struggling. Christ's joy enables him to feel with others. It allows him to connect with the people around him, whether it's lifting them up when they are struggling, crying with them, teaching them, correcting them, or just being with them in a positive way.
The joy of the gospel enables us to live whole heartedly (if you haven't noticed, I am quite obsessed with Brene Brown, so if you want to look more into whole hearted living, check out her book, "Daring Greatly"!!). We are able to experience all life has to offer us. We will still feel sorrow, pain, anger, disappointment, fear- the whole spectrum of emotions- but that doesn't mean we are doing anything wrong. We are living. Our joy is full when we embrace all aspects of the gospel, like living the commandments with an honest heart. Does that mean we'll be perfect? Heck no! We're going to make mistakes over and over and over and over and over! But with Christ's help, we have the power to gradually change over time (or even instantly, depending on the situation). Honestly, anything is possible. Some habits will be easier to change than others, but that doesn't mean we should give up when it's taking a little longer.

I know there are a lot of changes I need to make and some readjusting in my own life in order to get to where I want to be, but I know I am making progress one day at a time. I love my mistakes. I love where I am, where I've been, and where I'm going. I love that Christ will continue to help me as I live whole heartedly, no matter how many times I stumble.And I love that with Christ's help, I can be grateful for any circumstance. I can dance in the rain, as well as in the sunshine. I can appreciate the best as well as the hardest of times. I hope all is well with you and that you have a lovely week!

Lessons from the Law of Tithing

A lot of crazy stuff has been happening as of late. And holy canolis, I am learning a ton. Yes indeed. For one thing, I am learning just how important it is to be grateful in any circumstance. Gratitude has the power to transform our mindset from "why me" or "everything is awful and hard" to helping us see the wonderful people, skills, opportunities and surroundings that we already have. Another thing that I am learning again and again is the important of living within my means- not just financially, but it many other areas of life as well. I feel like if we start with gratitude for the things we have (while still maintaining a vision of where we'd like to get to), we will be more able to appreciate what we've already got, and in turn use what we have to its fullest. If we don't take care of what (or who) we already have in our lives, how are we going to manage more if and when it comes?

Choose to be grateful now. Choose to appreciate now and not get stuck in waiting for something else to make us satisfied with our lives.

I'll just jot down some thoughts and notes from Elder Bednar's, "Windows of Heaven" talk from October of 2013.

Principles of the law of tithing:
*Living within your means
*Living and maintaining life on a budget (prioritizing people, time, activities, etc)
*Gratitude
*Allowing others to serve as well as serving
*Bringing it all back to God

Significant but subtle blessings (may not initially notice)
Malachi: prove the Lord, live the law, the windows of heaven will be opened so there won't even be any room to receive them blessings

1 Corinthians 2:14 "But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned."

Dictionary: Discern: perceive or recognize, distinguish, detect, notice, observe, see

Windows allow natural light into a building (patterns of light) gradual, sudden, etc

(Ether 12:19) "Saw with their eyes the things which they had beheld with an eye of faith..."
Eyes of faith= faith is not a perfect knowledge, so eyes of faith indicate ability to move forward with hope, vision, and diligence even without knowing the outcome (believing the outcome is attainable)
 ACT and change our circumstances rather than be acted upon

Do more with less
Prioritize and simplify
Take care of what I have already acquired

What have I already acquired?
-Great family- mom and dad want the best for me
-supportive family and friends
-Really great ward
-two hands, all ten fingers, two eyes to see all the people, mountains, rain, trees, leaves, clouds, grass, reds, blues, yellows, greens, ears to listen to music, laughter, voices, hair, a beautiful face, lovely voice to sing with- so much for to be grateful for!

"The blessing that comes to us through the Heavenly windows may be greater capacity to change our own circumstances rather than expecting our circumstances to be changed by someone or something else."

Armies of Helaman- granted power to defeat enemy despite small numbers
-ask for success--> granted physical and mental stamina

Record daily
Write down God's hand in my life. Acknowledge His mercy, His blessings, and all He does through prayer, openly communicate with Him. Write down thoughts and impressions. ACT on them.

Those are just some thoughts that came into my mind as I read this talk. I'm really grateful for the chance I have to start fresh each day. I'm grateful that I have so many wonderful people in my life that are willing to help me out when I need it. I'm grateful for the capacity I'm developing to reach out to others as I work through my own struggles and issues one day at a time. I know that Heavenly Father and Christ are there with us as we learn on our individual journeys every day. I want to be better at taking time to notice all the wonderful things in my life. I am grateful to be here. I hope you have a great day!

Emily