Trust Leads to Constant Peace

Doctrine and Covenants 11:23-24

Behold thou art Hyrum, my son; seek the kingdom of God, and all things shall be added according to that which is just.

Build upon my rock, which is my gospel;

We both know that I tend to over-complicate things and/or over-analyze things.  Although usually I do that with good motives or intentions, it just creates added stress in my life.  If I remembered the point of this scripture, I think I would have a lot more peace in my difficult moments.  

Basically Christ is saying that all I have to do is seek the kingdom of God, which He expands upon as building upon His rock (His gospel).  The answer is so simple, like always.  If I focus on seeking the kingdom of God, I can trust that all my needs will be taken care of in the way that is just and good for me.  What a simple truth but giant promise!  

Can you imagine how much more simple our lives would be if we just remembered this?  Like today, I came home from school and my body started to freak out.  My hands were shaking.  I don't know if this is because I haven't been taking good care of myself or what, but I honestly think it is the stress of these last two days.  I think my body is in a state of constant adrenaline rush or something.  This week I haven't slept, because my mind won't shut off.  Basically, I'm out of whack.  What about if instead of thinking of my endless to do list, I thought, "Well, God has promised me that He'll give me everything I need if I seek His kingdom.  I'm doing my daily scripture study.  I'm praying.  I'm going to church.  I'm trying to do His will every day.  Yes, I don't do it perfectly by any means, but I am trying.  So that means that all my needs will be taken care of.  School stuff will work out.  Work stuff.  Lack of time and too much homework.  Fear.  Confusing things.  Everything will work out according to God's justice which is sure and good and gets me to where I need to be.  I don't have to worry!"  Wow, what a relief that would be!  I think my body wouldn't be shaking right now, and I think that I could sleep better at night.  I would be better able to do my homework because instead of writing under pressure, I'd be writing under peace and CONFIDENCE.   Confidence is the key to everything.  

This week, I'm going to use all the stress as an opportunity to better train my brain to maintain its peace, even under pressured circumstances.  I'm going to keep reminding myself that God is there and that He will provide for everything I need, because I am doing my part.  This seems to be my theme, because as I wrote about yesterday, I've been getting little stress tests.  I'm grateful because I think they are helping me to train my brain to maintain peace in whatever circumstances.  So on I go, I have to write 10 pages today for two papers due tomorrow, and I also have to work.  But I know that God will help me through it.  And He'll give me the strength I need so I don't burn out from all this stuff before finals week even gets here:)  God is so good!

I love you, and I hope all is going well for you,

Rachel 

AAAAH! Stress!!

Today I had one of the most stressful experiences that I've had in a long time.  Basically, today I had a ten page paper due and a presentation.  But I hadn't been able to work on the paper very much this week because of all the other homework assignments I was doing plus work.  In between classes today, I worked on it, and I had about an hour to do a whole boatload of work.  Well, I work diligently, and I find myself astonished at how much I'm getting done and how quickly it seems to be coming.  I definitely could feel God helping me, an answer to my million prayers of this week with me asking if He can help me make it through the craziness and not get too stressed.  At 12:45, I save my paper and exit out of it, ready to attach it to my email and send it in to my professor (it was due at 12:59).  After clicking the attachment button, nothing pops up.  I can't find my paper anywhere.  It has disappeared from the computer all together!  I try not to panic, as I walk to the help desk.  "Oh hey, so my paper disappeared.  Could you help me find it?"  A very nice guy comes to battle out the stress with me.  We were both looking at the time, and frantically trying to find where on earth my paper had gone.  I prayed in my heart over and over.  And just tried to breathe deeply, so I wouldn't start crying or fainting or something.  Finally, an idea popped in my head.  Let's look at files by date.  After a couple of minutes of searching, we found my paper which had been saved in the weirdest place on the computer.  Even typing in the name in the search box hadn't worked, and after my prayer, all of a sudden it turns up.  I resaved the paper as "Miracle" on the computer, sent it to my professor a minute early, and ran to class.

I just want to thank God for helping me.  I also want to thank Him for testing me, because I do feel that it was a test.  In one of my most stressful moments, something went on.  But it strengthened my ability to trust in God.  In my moment of stress, I did freak out a little bit.  Yet I took that anxiety and stress to God.  I told Him, "Hey God, I've been working hard.  I've been trying to do what You have asked.  And I am currently stressed out of my mind, just trying to survive.  I know You can do miracles and can help me with this crazy thing that happened.  Will you?"  I prayed knowing that whatever happened would be right and that even if it was lost, God would help me get compassion from my professor or something and just rewrite it.  Our moments of trial really stretch us and help us get closer to God.  The trust we build is such a peaceful feeling.  I believe that a peaceful interior is built upon trust in God.  There is no other way to get lasting peace.  I'm working on overcoming some fears that keep trying to get me.  And I'm working on growing in faith and trust.  I'm trying to learn how to be calm DURING the storm.  I'm trying to remember that Christ is in my boat DURING the storm while learning how to overcome my fears.  I know that God loves me and will give me exactly what I need to do it.  He tried my faith in a lot of little ways today, but I feel good about what happened because even though I didn't handle it perfectly, I chose to do the right thing.

I just wanted to send you this story to give some comfort during these next two crazy weeks.  And also leave you with this lovely scripture that was a good reminder to me:

"Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength and means provided to enable you to translate; but be diligent unto the end.
 Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea, that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work." (D&C 10:4-5)

We don't need to do things quickly or just get them done.  God wants us to have a balance and be diligent.  I feel that this is very applicable to finals week.  I'm trying to not let my perfectionist side overtake me as I write a billion pages and study for my final exams...I can only do what I can do.  And I can trust that God will help me.  If I pray to Him constantly, I'll come off conqueror!  I have felt Satan trying to play off of my fears in a lot of different ways these past couple of months.  But I'm learning how to overcome his new tactics, and I just need to remember that if I'm being obedient and especially if I'm praying, I can't fail.  I may mess up.  But I won't fail.

I love you Emily!!

Rachel    

Even in our punk moments, God loves and reassures us.

We are such punks, but God loves us anyways.  He knows where we each are individually.  And He knows how to reassure us in our moments of doubt or lack of confidence. This really hit me today when I was reading Doctrine and Covenants sections seven and eight.  In the first, John the Beloved had asked God to remain on earth until Christ comes so that he can bring more people to Christ.  Peter had asked to "speedily come" to God in His kingdom.  I don't know if I understand exactly what was happening, but it seems to me that Peter was kind of comparing himself to John, and saying something like, "How come he gets to stay?  Should I have said that?  Maybe my desire wasn't good..."  But Christ, knowing his heart and lovingly reassuring him says, "I say unto thee, Peter, this was a good desire.  But John wants to do work more here on Earth. He has undertaken a greater work so I will help him do it.  And you can elp him too.  You three will have this power and the keys of this ministry until I come."  I can hear the reassurance in Christ's voice.  Isn't that so typical of us?  We start comparing ourselves.  And Peter wasn't doing it in an envious way.  He seems to me to start to doubt his own motives and what he had chosen because of the good thing that John had chosen to do.

Christ responds, "Verily I say unto you, ye shall both have according to your desires, for ye both joy in that which ye have desired."  Isn't that beautiful?  They joyed in different things, but both of those choices are based in goodness.  And one choice wasn't better than the other.  They were just different. We each have our own path and our own choices to make.  If we folw the revelation we have received from God, we don't have to wonder, "Why does so-and-so have this?  Aren't I doing the right thing?"  or "So-and-so made this choice and it seems to be working out for them...maybe I should have made that choice too instead of the one I chose."  It is so easy to do this!  It seems harmless too because it isn't exactly envy.  However, this type of thinking creates a Lot's wife situation where we look backwards on what we have already received from God.  I'm sure that Peter felt good about his decision.  I'm sure he felt like God approved and all warm and fuzzy in his heart.  Only when he saw John's decision and the good it could do did he start looking back on what he had chosen.

In D&C 8, Oliver is also in a moment of doubt where he wants so badly to translate, but he hesitates.  Christ helps him through it: "Look, Oliver, I promise you that you can receive whatever knowledge you need as long as your ask in faith and with a sincere heart.  I will speak to your mind and heart through my spirit.  This is YOUR gift.  Trust in it. Remember these words.  Remember that this is YOUR gift.  Only God can give you this. Don't doubt it.  You will have the gift and you will do a great work with it.  It can't fail because it is the work of God.  Remember that without faith, you can't do anything.  So make sure you are asking in faith, and only ask what you should.  According to your faith, it will be done."

Again, I can feel the loving reassurance from Christ to Oliver here.  Oliver is looking back on revelation he has already received.  But Christ tells him twice, "Buddy, this is your gift.  God has given it to you. You can trust in it."  Remember these promises.
 
Sometimes we look at these stories and think about how silly these guys are.  Then we have that moment where we realize...oh, I do that all the time.  How many times do we question what we have received?  How many times do we question our own ability to complete a task that God has given us?  How many times do we wonder if we are doing the right thing after we already know that we are?  How many times do we compare ourselves to other people worried that maybe we aren't doing what God wants us to do just because they have chosen something different?

Luckily God loves us.  And He will send us the reassurance we need to continue forward.  God is so good and loving.  We can trust in that.  I know that sometimes I can be such a pest.  This week I kind of got a slap in the face when I realized how selfish, how inwardly focused, and how impatient I have been sometimes.  But God has been there in my moments of doubt, reassuring me.  Reminding me that I only have to take it day by day.  That I just need to keep going, keep obeying, keep listening for His voice.  And I can trust that it will come.  What a great Father we have.

I love you,

Rachel    

A Matter of Trust

Sorry it's been a while- but holy moly! I had a wonderful study today!! I decided that throughout this wonderful month of December, I'm going to read the story of Christ's life- not just his birth, but what he accomplished and who He became here in mortality.

I started off with the first chapter of Matthew. We are told that Joseph, a fine young man,  is engaged to none other than the fantasmagorical Mary. But wait. Joseph finds out she's preggers. Well shoot. Honestly that would come as quite a shock to anyone. But what really impressed me as I read this account is the trust that they were both able to develop. Joseph's ability to trust Mary is incredible. She told him that she was pregnant and it had been through God, and instead of immediately rejecting her and allowing her to suffer the intense penalty at that time, he tried to do all he could to protect her. Joseph easily could have abandoned her completely, he could have chosen to believe she was lying- I mean she doesn't have much evidence to back her up at this point- but ends up deciding to really think of all the options with the information he had:

"But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son and thou shalt call his name Jesus: for he shall save his people from their sins....

...Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us"


Joseph was able to receive personal revelation straight from God in regards to how he should move forward in his relationship with Mary. He was able to find out for himself, through the angel, that she had been telling him the truth. What an amazing experience! And just thinking about what was going on over in Mary's part of the story- she had been told by an angel she'd give birth to the son of God. That would be terrifying to not know who would believe you- family, friends, and especially her future husband, who, let's be honest, probably didn't know her all that well at this point. But I love that Mary's job wasn't to convince Joseph that she was telling the truth- all she needed to do was tell him what had happened, and after that God was able to confirm what she had said.

And that's something I need to be better at in all of my relationships- family, friends, etc.-trusting as I speak truth and put God first, He will provide the rest. in Because Joseph trusted Mary initially, and was looking what direction to take, he was able to receive a fuller knowledge of his situation and move forward in a positive direction. And because of Mary's trust in God, she was able to bravely tell Joseph the truth, even though the odds of him believing her were extremely slim. So after all the feels and the shares, both are able to receive a specific answer from God independently of one another, which allowed them to grow closer together as their relationship progressed.

I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father that knows the hearts of each of his children. I am grateful that He lets us figure things out one step at a time- and I am grateful that He is always willing to let us see the bigger picture when we are ready to progress. I know that one of the most important things we can focus on while we are here is the relationships we develop with our family, friends, and others we meet along the way. And I am learning as we take time to establish and enrich our own relationship with God, I definitely know we will have a greater ability to trust, love, and understand those around us. I know it's not always going to be perfect. I know not everything always goes the way we want it to- sometimes life downright stinks. A lot. But I know I can trust in God and it will all work out. I know He has done so much for me, and I am grateful for the patience, love, and understanding He shows me on a daily basis. I am so excited to learn more about Him and about Christ over this next month! I love you so much and I hope you have a most excellent week!

Much love,
Emmers

Fear Not, Little Flock

Doctrine and Covenants 6:33-35

33 Fear not to do good, my sons, for whatsoever ye sow, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sow good ye shall also reap good for your reward.
 34 Therefore, fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail.
 35 Behold, I do not condemn you; go your ways and sin no more; perform with soberness the work which I have commanded you.

This is by far one of my all time favorite scriptures.  I can't even describe how much it helped me in the mission.  In a difficult companionship situation, I found myself feeling trapped in my own fears.  Every time I would shine or love or give or do good, my companion would react in a negative way.  It was a competition for her, and she tried many things to stifle my light.  Sometimes it worked.  I reached a point where I was afraid to be myself, to shine, to do good.  

In my moment of intense fear, God guided me to this scripture.  Through it He told me that I did not need to be afraid to do good.  Isn't it crazy that the fear of doing good can be more powerful than the fear of doing bad?  It was for me.  It makes sense though because as we do good, we can become a powerful influence to spread the light of God.  And who would be angry about that?  Satan.  Who would start to attack?  Satan.  That is exactly what he did.  I learned on my mission that the way that Satan can get to me is through using the fears of other people to attack me in different ways.  He was using my companion's fear of inadequacy or lack of confidence or whatever it was to get me to stifle my light.  

However, the promises of God got me through those attacks and helped me to become a whole lot stronger than I was then.  He says, "fear not, little flock."  I can feel the love of Jesus Christ in that statement.  He'll take care of me.  I am a little sheep in His flock and He loves me.  Then he commands me to "do good" even if "earth and hell combine against [me]."  It takes so much courage to do good, because the opposition becomes greater.  But He promises that if we are built upon His rock, the opposition cannot prevail.  That promise got me through a lot of attacks, a lot of companionship situations, a lot of opposition.  Sometimes it felt like the opposition was winning.  Sometimes it looked like that.  But God reassured me that He knew that I was fighting with all I had, and even though I was weak, I was His little lamb, and He didn't condemn me, but allowed me to go my way and "sin no more."  He helped me day by day to overcome the obstacles that so easily beset me, which enabled me to perform the work that He had commanded me to do.  God is so good!

By far my favorite part of the scripture is the last two verses about Jesus Christ:  

36 Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.
 37 Behold the wounds which pierced my side, and also the prints of the nails in my hands and feet; be faithful, keep my commandments, and ye shall inherit the kingdom of heaven. Amen.

I know that if we look unto Christ in every thought, we can overcome our fears.  We can fight our doubts.  Christ knows that it is not easy for us.  He doesn't expect us to overcome our doubts and fears in one second.  But He does expect us to constantly turn our hearts and minds to Him when they start turning towards our fears.  Life is a constant turning back to Christ.  Many things get us to look away.  Yet we know because of the wounds that pierced His side, and also the prints of the nails in his hands and feet, that if we are faithful and keep His commandments, we can have eternal life.  We can become whole.  Even though we will have a constant battle here on earth, and we may feel afraid sometimes, Christ overcame the world.  He died for us, which means the good already won, and the opposition is weaker than the good.  If we look to Christ, we cannot fail because we will be built upon His rock.  We won't be perfect.  All that Christ expects us to do is to look unto him.  Just keep turning our heads to Him when they start to stray.  He will forgive us and guide us to Him every time because His arms are always extended towards His little flock.

I know that God loves us and that we can do anything in Christ.
I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

I love you, and I can't wait to see you on Friday!

Rachel 

Take it to God First

Only if we receive something directly from God can we know anything for sure.  That's what I love about what God says about Martin Harris in Doctrine and Covenants Section 5.  He can know for himself, obtain a testimony of the plates, if he will humble himself sufficiently before the Lord, humble himself in fervent prayer and faith, with a sincere heart.  Only then will God let him see the things he wants to see.  If he doesn't humble himself before God and receive a testimony from God's hand, he will fall in transgression.

There is a lot of great stuff to unpack in this chapter.  But what hit me is the power and protection of a testimony.  Martin Harris wanted one, but he was struggling to go to the correct source to get it.  He wanted to see the plates to gain a testimony.  God wanted to show him that only through going to Him could he gain that testimony.

God wants us to receive answers directly from Him.  I know that in my own life, the answers that I have received directly from God, recognizing and knowing they came from Him, have gotten me through darkness, trial, and confusion.

In Section 5, God tells Joseph to wait until God tells Him to do something and God will give the means to accomplish what He tells him to do.  Joseph just has to be faithful in keeping the commandments of God, and he will be saved.  Isn't it all so simple?  We just go directly to the source and receive answers from God, the One who knows everything.  And then we just follow through with what He tells us to do.  We don't even have to worry, because the One who never lies promises us that He'll provide everything we need to do what He asks of us.

Well, unfortunately, it isn't quite so easy and simple when it comes to human beans. At least this bean.

What keeps us from doing what God wants us to do?

Martin Harris wanted to see the plates to believe that Joseph Smith was called to do the work and that they actually existed.  Don't we do the same thing?  That way of thinking is quite logical when it comes to the world.  But, of course, God knows better.

I know for me that I've had many moments of questions.  I tend to ask a lot of them.  But when I start getting impatient for answers, or when I'm questioning in fear instead of faith, I tend to go first to every source but God to get an answer.  My friends and family, books, music, whatever other great tools there are to figure things out.  And those things aren't bad!  Was it bad that Martin Harris wanted to see the plates?  No!  God even told Him that if he humbled himself, he could see them.  The problem was that he wasn't following the pattern set by God.  The pattern that leads to true knowledge and personal peace.  Only an answer from God can protect us from the storm.  Only an answer from God can motivate us to maintain hope even in the darkest of times.  Only an answer from God can give us sufficient faith to move forward.  We've got to take it to God first.  Then we can use all those great tools as God tends to work through the things or people we have around us to give us our answers.

I testify of the power of prayer.  I know that God wants to guide us.  He wants to give us answers.  Maybe we won't receive them in the time we wish or in the way we wish, but we can trust God and His guidance and especially His love.  He wants us to succeed, and prayer is the only way to be successful in life.  I also know that God is merciful.  This entire week that fact seems to pop up in my mind every time I do my personal study.  Its because I need it.  Although I'm kind of struggling, meaning feeling like I'm in a spiritual battle, exhausted to the point where I have to fight even to pray sometimes, God knows me and loves me and forgives me.  I just have to keep plugging along, trying to open my heart to Him even when it feels like every time I pray, one of those tongs is around my heart, trying to shut it.  The most important thing is that we keep fighting those tongs and don't give up.  Because I know that God gives me everything I need to do the right thing and to get where I need to be.  So what need I fear?

I love you,

Rachel

"That We May be Purified, even as He is Pure."

Heavenly Father sure does answer prayers. And fast. Yes indeedie doodles.
For the last month or so, I've been asking God for the ability to value my voice and a greater capacity to forgive (myself and others). More specifically, I want to be able to take back my power, which has been spread thin from different experiences throughout my life, and to be able to say "no" with confidence in Him and in myself. I feel as though there have been a lot of opportunities lately to put these particular goals into practice, and I will share just one of them. God is a great teacher, that's all I can say.

I work in customer service, a mighty fine test of patience and endurance, if I do say so myself. There was a particularly unpleasant interaction I had towards the end of my shift with a certain lady. When she came to the register for the purchase, she had a certain number of her product, which in bulk, equaled a specific amount of money. Buying each product individually would save 50 cents from the grand total- but when going to five, the price is set, then to ten, the price is set, etc. etc. Anyhowsers, once she saw the grand total for the ten items she decided it was too much and demanded she pay for everything at the individual price. I explained her it's the store policy once she reaches a certain number to pay the set price and showed her on the register it'd be a 50 cent difference in totals. Escalating in rudeness and throwing a fit, she continued to demand that her price be met, as i continued to (as calmly as I could, explain that was our store policy). I honestly don't know how to explain everything I felt, but I couldn't believe a grown woman was acting so rudely and intensely over such a minor incident- and that she was being dishonest over 50 cents.

She continued to speak very condescending to me, until I rang her up (ending up giving her the 50 cents off, much to my dismay). Immediately, her countenance changed and she became all bubbly and cute and happy and said, "Sorry for being so difficult, 50 cents is 50 cents you know." The next thought that crossed my mind was, "Yeah, whatever, bitch." I was shocked. Why would I let this incident affect me so deeply? Why get worked up over this experience? I was so angry at her acting like a child, I was upset that she thought she could get her way by acting out. Although I didn't say it out loud, I couldn't believe that had been my honest reaction to such an insignificant situation. I didn't know this woman. I had spoken with her all of ten minutes, and I will probably never see her again. As she left, the words from the sermon on the mount came into my mind, "For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? Do not even the publicans the same?"
I realized (probably for the millionth time in my life) that it's really easy to be nice to people that are already nice to you- but how many of us make the effort to genuinely seek to love, care for, and especially understand those who wrong us? I have major forgiveness issues for various reasons and realized I was so upset at this situation, not because I was actually angry with the woman, but because I was projecting my own hidden issues on to her actions.

As I closed up and went home, I kept hearing my own words echo in my head, ashamed of reacting in such a hostile way, and being extremely annoyed that I was letting myself be so affected by someone else's actions. After much pondering and praying, I came to realize this experience was tied to what I had been asking for- I had asked to find a greater capacity to forgive and to my voice. And when I had used my voice, this woman shot me down time and time again, very rudely I might add. And I figured out that I resented this woman for her ability to voice her desires and (although I don't agree with what she did and how she did it) I actually admired the fact that she could use her voice to get what she wanted. I resented her for her voice because I recognized through our interaction that I still have a long way to go, I was jealous that I still feel like I am not making a lot of progress. I realized that I had no idea what her experiences in life were- what her triggers are or why she acts the way she does, but God knows. And as long as I work on myself and forgive myself, I know He will take care of everything else. And I think this also ties into what you've been studying-on being compassionate and merciful towards yourself when you mess up. If you choose to do so, then you will be all the better prepared to show that same love and compassion on others in life.

I decided to visit the sermon on the mount in my studies this morning- and I really loved what Christ tells us:

"Ye have heard it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in Heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others?"

God doesn't expect us to get it all at once. He wants to try time and time again, allowing us to fail so we know what it's like to receive His divine help and to recognize we really can't make these changes on our own. I know that the gospel of Jesus Christ is such a deeply personal experience for those who choose to embrace it. Although everyone's circumstances are completely different, the principles of the gospel apply no matter who you are, what you've done, and wherever you go. We are promised if we have faith in Jesus Christ and his atonement, we are allowed to change through the gift of repentance. As we do so, God allows us to make a wonderful promise with Him, to be WILLING to be obedient in His commandments (baptism for those who have not entered into the covenant, and the sacrament for those who have been baptized). In return for making this promise to Him, He gives us the companionship and guidance of the Holy Ghost, who purifies us, leads us, comforts us, and enables us to be prepared to meet God as we endure to the end (making more covenants along the way). Although we will fall short again and again while here on earth, we are promised that if we give Him our absolute best in all things, not only will we live with Him again, but we will be "purified even as he is pure."

"Where, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become [the daughters] of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure." Moroni 7:48

I am so grateful for a kind, patient, loving Father in Heaven that knows and understands my own experiences and weaknesses and will allow me to grow in my own way. I know He is proud of all you are doing and becoming! Keep up the great work!!

Love,
Emmaline

The Purpose of God Cannot Be Frustrated

The works, designs, and purposes of God cannot be frustrated.  Only the work of man can be frustrated.

In Doctrine and Covenants Section 3, Joseph Smith has just lost the manuscript.  God tells him it is because of his transgression and that he feared man over God.

Joseph's ability to translate and be a part of God's work was frustrated for a time.  I'm sure Joseph felt frustrated with himself.  But God's work continued on.  Towards the end of the chapter, He asserts His promises that all people will come to know of the Savior through the Book of Mormon.  Just because Joseph let his fear overtake him, does not mean that the promises of God will not come to pass.

What does all this mean?

To me, it means that I can trust in the work of God.

What is God's work?
To bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.

Part of that plan was the Book of Mormon.  Part of that plan is Joseph Smith working as an instrument in God's hands.  Part of that plan is my own personal salvation.

Did Joseph Smith's moment of weakness keep him from eternal life?  Did it keep the work of God from moving forward?  No!  Yes, he was chastised, and he did have to repent.  But God gave him a second chance (and more).

So do my moments of weakness have to keep me from eternal life?  Do they have to impede the plan of God for me?  No!  I may need to be reminded and chastised, but God will give me the opportunity to repent.

Sometimes I find myself fearing man over God.  Sometimes I find myself making mistakes.  Sometimes I find myself not putting God first in my life like I should.  But does that mean all hope is lost?  Never!  That is what I love about the first verse of D&C 3.  The work of God cannot be frustrated.  We are a part of that work.  If we are constantly repenting or turning to God, our work and our personal plans will not be frustrated.  They may be delayed, but God already knows what will happen and He has a way to get us back on track.

The only thing that frustrates our own work is when we become prideful, stop listening to the counsels of God and follow our own wills.  When we let fear overcome us.  When we fear man over God.  When we let fear replace our faith.

BUT...

"Remember, God is merciful; therefore, repent of that which thou hast done which is contrary to the commandment I gave you, and thou art still chosen, and art again called to the work."    

Our mistakes do not have to keep us from reaching our divine potentials.  Despite the mistakes, we can still be chosen!  All we have to do is repent.

I am so grateful for the gift of repentance in my life.  It is such a comfort to know that I can trust in the plan of God, not only on a large scale, but on a smaller, personal scale.  I let myself get so afraid to make mistakes.  But today I realized that my mistakes don't have to keep me from reaching my divine potential because of repentance.  I don't have to be afraid to do something that would change my eternal potential forever.  Even in my weakness and though I make mistakes, repentance can restore me to being "chosen" again.  All is not lost.  The theme of mercy has been following me around.  I think I'm finally learning how to better apply it to myself.  It is life changing!

Well, I love you and thanks for your light!
Rachel    

That Refining Fire Though

Lots of cool insights from the last few days- I'd like to try to convey them in this post, so I apologize in advance if you have trouble connecting all my ideas together. Here we go!

So I was able to talk with two amazing women in the last couple of days, who have both been through so much while here on earth. The scripture that came to mind while I was talking with both of them was Job 23:10 "But he knoweth the way that I take; when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold." The pure love, true joy, peace, and light that radiated from both these women was a huge testimony to me of the power of the refiner's fire.

Although I met these women independently of one another, both had some amazing parallels in the trials they shared, and also who they decided to become through living the gospel of the Jesus Christ. Both women had been married relatively young and found themselves within an abusive marriage. One told me how her husband was an extremely charismatic guy, seemed to be amazing to everyone else, but once it was just them, emotionally manipulated and abused her. Year and after year, she pleaded with God that he would change and embrace the gospel in his life again, but it seemed as though her prayers were going unanswered. Eventually, she ended up finding out that he had an affair and he left the church, so she decided it was best to move on and get a divorce. There was a lot of hurt, pain, and warped truth- she said it was so difficult for her to recover her trust towards men after such a negative marriage. Although she never would have guessed it in a million years- she is so grateful for all the trials she experienced with her first husband- she is now happily married to a worthy, proactive priesthood holder, and together, they are raising a family centered in the gospel of Jesus Christ. She has told me that she knows because of the sorrow and pain she has experienced, she has a much deeper capacity to help others through similar situations.

Other woman I spoke with found herself in a physically abusive marriage. It was terrifying for her to never know when he would strike next, and she feared for both her and her children's safety. After divorcing this man, this incredible woman, a single mother for 15 years after that, focused her energy and efforts towards God and Jesus Christ. Through their help, she was able to support her 3 kids for the next decade or so, until she and her current husband met. They are amazing together! And there is so much peace and light that radiates from them both.

Anyhowsers, both women had such pure, stalwart testimonies of the importance of keeping the gospel of christ in their lives. They both testified of how that had been the only way they had made it through such challenging and dark times. They both shared how grateful they are now that things unfolded the way they did- and how they are still working on it- but they have experienced a beautiful amount of healing thanks to the atonement of Jesus Christ.
And that is the amazing thing about the gospel. We are not promised that we will get off without any challenges, heartache, or pain. On the contrary, we knew full well we were signing up for some pretty messed up experiences here on earth- but we trust in the promises of our Father. We trusted (and still trust) that through the atoning sacrifice of Christ, our trials have the ability to refine us. We can choose to allow our pains and our afflictions to shape us into beings that can love beyond ourselves, beings that can reach out and help others who struggle even when we don't have it all together. I truly know that your study about being merciful is a huge part of our test here in mortality. Forgiveness is such a beautiful and heavenly trait- and honestly, unless we have made a mistake and experienced the beauty of mercy for ourselves, it is next to impossible to apply that trait to someone else.

As we incorporate the gospel of Jesus Christ into our lives daily, we will develop the ability to apply forgiveness to ourselves when we mess up, which in turn, will allow us to exercise mercy to those around us. As we hone these wonderful skills here on earth, we are preparing ourselves for our divine existence when we are reunited with our Father in Heaven once again. And like you said, it is definitely not about getting it right- or even about the end goal- it is all about how we get there.

I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is there to transform us into our best selves- and it is also here to provide shelter from the crazy storms of life, because seriously, mortality is no picnic. Well most days ;) I love you oh so much and I am so grateful for your diligence, testimony, and light you share!

Much love,
Emily

Give a little Mercy to Yourself Today

I found a scripture in Doctrine and Covenants today that I LOVE.  I feel like I say something similar in every blog post, but it feels good to find something that clicks with you during personal study.  I've been struggling to concentrate on anything be it school work, scripture study, prayers, the present moment, everything.  But I know that God sees our effort, and even though we sometimes don't do things perfectly, well, we never do things perfectly, that He accepts what we give.  I feel like this week I haven't been giving Him much.  Meaning I've been distracted in my personal study and personal prayers.  However, I have been trying and fighting and working.  He accepts what I give as long as I don't give up.  Although my personal prayers and studies have been a bit distracted, I'm still doing them.  And I also am trying to follow what the Spirit tells me to do which has given me some good opportunities to help people.  Anyways, the reason why I'm saying all of this is because I have a feeling that I'm not alone in this.  We all get in moments like this.  And we can be super hard on ourselves thinking, "Why don't I feel like praying?  Why don't I feel excited to read scriptures today?  Why can't I concentrate on the things that matter most?"  When we should remember that it doesn't matter as long as we push through it.  As long as we are obedient even when it is hard.  Like a runner who practices when her muscles hurt.  A pianist that practices even when she is not motivated.  Those are the people who are going to go far.  I feel it is the same for us spiritually.  We can do it.

Back to the scripture:

Doctrine and Covenants 1:28
And inasmuch as they were humble they might be made strong, and blessed from on high, and receive knowledge from time to time.

Humility is the key to true strength.  It is the key to receive God's blessings whether that is knowledge or something else.  We must always acknowledge our dependence on God and recognize His hand in our lives.  I don't think that God gets mad at us when it is hard for us to find Him or recognize the blessings as long as we are trying to find them.  Looking for them is the most important part.  We may miss something in our mortal tendency towards blindness, but I know that God appreciates our efforts.

I guess today my point is; BE MERCIFUL TO YOURSELF.  Sometimes we spend so much time looking at what we aren't doing or how inadequate what we do is, that we don't realize how good we are doing.  I feel like God feels happier when someone obeys Him in the hardest moment, than when someone obeys Him in the easiest moment.  Of course He is happy for both, but I don't think He is thinking during our hardest moments, "Rachel, you could be concentrating more in your personal study.  Come on!"  He is thinking, "Rachel, I know it is tough right now and I'm proud that you are even reading at all.  That even when your mind wanders that you turn it back on track and keep reading, keep studying.  That is what counts.  That turning."  If we are trying to turn our hearts to God, no matter how imperfect that may be, He is happy!

I know God loves us and is merciful.  We need to be like Him by treating ourselves with the same mercy.  He doesn't want us to attack ourselves.  He wants us to be like Him which means loving, merciful, and accepting, especially to ourselves.

Love,

Rachel

Seeking Balance

Sorry it's been a while since I've posted anything- I have discovered as of late- that I am indeed a wee bit off balance with certain areas of my life. But I sure do have the power to get back on track, thanks to good old Padre Celestial and Jesus Christ. I am ever so grateful for them, yes ma'am I am!

I had a wonderful study today- it related a lot to what we were talking about this weekend- balance in all things is the key!

As I took the sacrament the other day, I was pondering over how to become more balanced. My thoughts turned to Christ, and I thought, how did He balance His life? All He ever did was go out of His way to serve others, elevate, inspire, and leave things better than he found them. He must have had such an exhausting life! And compared to how long we are here on earth- his time was extremely short- especially his actual ministry. But think of all the incredible miracles He was able to accomplish in such a short amount of time! And how was all of that possible? Everything Christ did points back to our Father in Heaven. "I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgement is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me." (John 5:30) Christ shows us that giving our hearts completely to God enables us to access the enabling power of his atonement, and in turn grants us the ability to accomplish God's will, no matter how difficult or impossible it may seem.

The two questions I asked myself this morning as I started my study were:

How does Christ put God first?

How can I better put God first?

And then I was lead to a wonderful talk by Quinton L. Cook, called "Choose Wisely". Bam. Just what the doctor ordered. The biggest principles that stuck out to me were

• Do not embrace excuses
• Without accountability, there is no progress/improvement
• We need to rise above rationalizations
• It's not enough to simply "avoid the bad things" we need to be proactively involved in keeping our covenants 

In these last days, Satan is working in so many subtle and seemingly harmless way to take us further from God. So much of the time, it's not even a huge mistake that'll always draw us away- but small consistent decisions that distract us from our divine potential. I can't tell you how much I needed to hear that idea today. It really is in the small daily decisions that we strengthen our bond with God and develop who He wants us to become. I get distracted so so easily, especially with things I feel are urgent at the time, but end up consuming too much of me that I end up neglecting my personal relationship with God. And that always needs to come first, no matter what. 

"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will...for the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves." D&C 58: 27-28

We have the power to choose whatever path we desire. We have the ability to accomplish ANYTHING the Lord asks of us- and He also grants us the power to figure things out on our own. I know that I am far from figuring everything out-but I know God will continue to help me understand what I need to be focusing on both eternally and in the here and now. Christ was able to help everyone he came in contact with because He understood His relationship with His Father. He understood that he needed to live proactively, that Heavenly Father requires willing obedience, and a willing heart. Because of this knowledge AND the willingness to put it into action, Christ completed his mission here on earth. We too can complete our individual missions here in mortality as we remained focused on our savior and our Father in Heaven. I know He is so proud of all you do and I know that He will continue to lead you to where you need to be!

Much love,

Emily

The Winds and Waves Enable the Promised Land

A talk entitled "Sobre la superficie de las aguas," made me think a lot about the importance of trials in my life.  The guy who wrote it, Jon Warner, used his trial to get closer to God by learning how to depend on Him, moment by moment.  He referred to Ether chapter two where the Jaredites have been promised by God that they will arrive at the promised land.  Yet they have to deal with storms, getting dunked way deep into the sea, and a bunch of other hardship which caused a boatload of fear (he he...get it?).  Anyways, as he was studying about the Jaredite experience, he realized that the thing that actually got the people to the promised land was the thing that caused them so much fear.

The fierce winds and waves were sloshing and raging, but they were always pushing the boat towards the promised land.

The winds and waves enabled the blessings and promises of God.  

God promises us things, and then gives us trials so we can receive the promises.  Yet sometimes we begin to think that the winds and the waves prevent us from getting the promises, when really they enable the promises.  I know that if we do God's will that we will reach the promised land, whatever that may be.  The tricky part of all of it is to remember this perspective in the very moment where the wave is dunking your boat deep into the ocean, in the very moment that a wave has crashed on the deck and threatened to topple you over, the very moment when you look out of the boat and all you see is darkness.  In these moments, we must remember that we are going towards the promise land and to trust in that.  We must remember that we are in God's hand.  A perfect being is putting in all His effort and energy and love to get us to the ultimate goal of eternal life.

Can we trust in that?  Yes!

I know that God loves us.  He does test us.  He will ask us to prove to Him that He is first in our lives.  He will test our trust in Him.  But if we are willing to submit ourselves to His will, even if that means leaving our comfort-zone homes to embark on a journey to the promised land, our trials will enable us to be eternally blessed.  It will enable us to receive all of our heart's deepest desires.  I'm working to not only do God's will, but to walk forward with peace in my heart instead of fear.  I'm working to remember that my trials will enable me to get the promises of God.  Not only remember, but to trust in that.

I love God.  He is the best Father.

And I love you!

Rachel

  

The Law of Sacrifice

The whole concept of sacrifice has been on my mind lately, so I decided to use my personal study time to explore it a bit.

To sacrifice means "to give up something valuable or precious, often with the intent of accomplishing a greater purpose or goal."  It is a vital part of the gospel of Jesus Christ.  I mean...the entire plan of God is based on one sacrifice.  So wouldn't our entire salvation depend on that one sacrifice as well as our willingness to sacrifice?

Of course.

Before the people had to sacrifice animals as a way to look forward to the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  Now God requires a different type of sacrifice: a broken heart and a contrite spirit.  I decided to dive into the meaning of these two phrases and found a lot of stuff.  Some good ol' definitions:

• A willingness to repent
• Feel sorrow for sin and a sincere desire to repent.  
• Desire to serve Jesus Christ
• Desire to put our lives in harmony with God's commandments
• Be humble and receptive to the will of God
• Be receptive to the counsel of those God has called to direct His church.  

Well, I know I have the need to repent all of the time, but this particular study, the definition that stuck out to me more was "be humble and receptive to the will of God."  The tricky part of this one for me is that this definition is not so easy to follow as, for example, "keep the commandments" or "listen to the prophet's counsel."  We can find those things pretty much laid out for us in many places.  But the prophets don't say, "Hey Rachel, you should go to this college.  Hey Rachel, you should apply for this job."  It is our responsibility to seek out the will of God, but that does not mean to just read the scriptures or the words of the prophets and find the black and white stuff and follow it.  It means to take the higher law: to figure out what God is saying to us personally at this time, in this place.  That is a bit trickier, at least for me.

In order to give the sacrifice that God requires of me, I must be willing to sacrifice anything He wants me to.  I must be willing to completely turn my will to His and trust that by doing so, I will receive all of the blessings and promises and goodness that He has in store for me.  Sometimes God requires a lot of us.  Sometimes God's will doesn't seem to make sense with everything else that He says.  But we can trust that as we keep going, not knowing what is ahead of us, God will guide our footsteps to get to where we need to go.  Precisely because we were willing to sacrifice what He required of us.

I found a scripture that I love in Doctrine and Covenants 97:8

"Verily I say unto you, all among them who know their hearts are honest, and are broken, and their spirits contrite, and are willing to observe their covenants by sacrifice--yea, every sacrifice which I, the Lord, shall command--they are accepted of me."

I know that to be accepted by God, we must be willing to sacrifice anything that He requires of us.  Only then are our hearts broken and our spirits contrite.  Even though it can be super duper duper hard to sacrifice what God requires of us, His acceptance is the most important thing in this life.  It will be worth it every time because by doing His will, we will get to where we need to go.

I also know that God doesn't require sacrifices just willy-nilly.  He has a plan.  He has a goal.  And He guides us to reach that ultimate goal.  We can trust Him.  I feel like many people have this false notion that they can't say what they want to God because then He'll send them the opposite.  I heard that so many times on the mission from companions or other missionaries, "I can't say that I want to stay in this area, because He'll take me out."  I found that notion to be so weird because, yes, God doesn't always give us what we think we want, but He doesn't set out to give us exactly what we don't want.  I know that if we take the time to think and work to understand and know God, we will find a loving Heavenly Father who WILL guide us to get what we want.  He may take us on a different route than we were expecting.  And He may have His own timing.  But He will give us what makes us most happy and if we learn how to be in tune with that, we will find that our wants are becoming more and more like His wants.  And that even when we can't see how on earth that we will ever get what we want, He will get us there.  We can trust that even when He does something completely unexpected and hard and scary, it is for a reason.

Am I willing to sacrifice everything to do His will?  Am I willing to take a risk and move forward in darkness?  Am I willing to do that not in fear, but in faith?  I'm working to be that way.  It is scary sometimes, and sometimes it really hurts.  But I will move forward and faith, knowing that God is a Father of love and goodness, and He wants me to be completely happy.  He'll get me there.  He has shown me the goal, and thrown a looptey-loop in the pathway to get there, but I know that all will be okay in His timing.  

I love you,

Rachel

All That He Requires of You

Ever stop to think about just how amazing God is? Sometimes, I honestly forget to think about everything He has done and everything He continues to do for the good of each one of his children. I was reading in Mosiah today- and boy oh boy do I sure love that king Benjamin though- and he's got some pretty dang great words of wisdom, if I do say so myself.

He reminds us that God has given us our bodies, that He is the father of our spirits and the reason for our very existence. King Benjamin also teaches of the plan of salvation, and if not for God providing us a savior, we'd all be toasted. "If ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another- I say, if you should serve him with all your whole souls yet yet would be unprofitable servants.
And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments."

For all the things He constantly does for us daily, and all throughout eternity, that's really not too much to ask. And really thinking about it, everything He commands us to do only benefits us. The commandments allow us peace and the ability to more fully feel His presence in our lives. They help us understand His will, they physically and spiritually protect us- and most importantly, they help us prepare to become like Him. Honestly- it is all about us. God doesn't do anything for Himself- His sole purpose is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. Think about that- I know I don't  enough. His WORK. His GLORY. His eternal joy- is making sure I have the opportunity to one day live with Him again. And that is His mindset for every single one of His children. He wants us all to have the opportunity to make it. And His love is so pure, so deep, and so understanding of each one of us, He has it all mapped out so that each of His children will end up in a state where they are comfortable. He knows not everyone will want to do and become what is required to live with Him- but He still wants them to be happy. Isn't that amazing? He is thinking about everyone!! Not just those that did "what they were supposed to"- but every single one of us. I know I want to do all I can in my life to live with Him again. And I want to better understand my role in the lives of my friends and family that will allow me to help them have that same desire.

I've been thinking about how I can better understand my role in other's lives- and my answer came in chapter 4 of Mosiah. If we personally understand our relationship with God, then these feelings will naturally follow: "If ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, I would that ye should retain in rememberance the greatness of God and your own nothingness and his goodness and longsuffering towards you...
...and if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge which is just and true. And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably...and ye [shall teach your children] to love one another, and to serve one another. And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor: ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need...
...I would that ye should impart of your substance...and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants.
And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength."

So what does God expect of us? To keep his commandments, which will lead us to remember Him, His plan, His love, and His mercy in our lives. By doing so, He promises to fill us with His love for each of His children, and that we will have the capacity to care for those around us. On our own, I know this is true, we will end up exhausting ourselves- but as we are diligent in remembering God in our own lives, we are given the power to help those in need all around us. I know that I really am nothing without God. I know that He has done so much for me, and I know honestly, there are times I really don't deserve His patience and love. But I am so so grateful that He loves me despite my mistakes, weaknesses, and imperfections. I am grateful that He has provided Jesus Christ to help me change and to allow me the chance to start over (A LOT) and become more like Him. And I know that as I keep His commandments and the covenants I have made with Him, He will allow me the opportunity to help others realize those same truths for themselves. All He requires is that I keep his commandments to the best of my ability. I won't be perfect all at once, but my heart is all he requires.

I love you oh so so much!
Emily

I'm All About That Faith- or least I'm trying

I had a lot of questions for God today. Yes sir, indeed I did. Do you ever get that feeling where your brain is on fast forward? Where thought after thought comes gushing at you faster than you can process and before you know it, there is hurricane brain tizzy all up in your head? I was feeling that very way this day. As I opened my scriptures, the first page I opened to was just for me. I felt like God had heard my frenzied freakouts and just went, Emily, you need to calm down- how bout you just read this and chill out for a second.

I saw the chapter and immediately, all my panic, worry, frustration, and anger melted away- I was overcome with relief. With peace, and with a, "Oh Heavenly Father- you know me all too well." Hebrews, Chapter 11 was starting up at me, ready to answer everything. Faith. It all comes back to faith in Jesus Christ. How do I move forward when I don't know what the future holds? Center my faith on Jesus Christ. What if I don't know if what I say will push someone away? Put my faith in Christ. What if I am afraid of man more than God? How can I change that? FOCUS MY FAITH ON JESUS CHRIST (Those were just some of the questions running around my brain as of late).
But seriously- after reading this chapter, it all comes down to faith- believing in Christ and putting that belief into action!

This chapter talks about so many different people- about Enoch, Moses, Rahab, Noah, Sara, Abraham- it spoke of what they were able to accomplish and also what they were able to learn because of their faith. And that is something that I love about faith in Jesus Christ. It is a constant learning process. When we exercise faith, we are showing God that we trust in Him and that we are willing to open our hearts to learn more about the gospel He has provided for us. In the Book of Mormon, Ether 12:6 states, "Faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith."

Really thinking about that last phrase "Ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith" made me realize that spiritual knowledge only comes when we are willing to put complete trust in God and in His son Jesus Christ. As we show our trust to them through our actions, they are willing to teach us what we need to learn:

• Abraham's trial= sacrifice his only son, leading him to learn and internalize the atonement of Christ in his own life
• Sara's trial= barren most of her life but blessed with a son, helping her understand through Christ all shall live
• Noah's trial= build an ark before it started raining, learned that only through Jesus Christ we can be clean (baptism yo!)....and probs one of the first prophets to endorse emergency prepardness!
• Moses's trial= (so many, so I will only pick one example for this champ) Leave life of luxury and riches to join his people, learned the importance of fearing God more than fearing man

All of these amazing people were able to overcome these seemingly impossible experiences- that's right- by putting their faith in Jesus Christ! They didn't fully understand why they needed to do what God asked them to do, but afterwards, they were enlightened. And that's how life works. We learn bit by bit, piece by piece as we are willing to put our best effort forward. Our faith in Jesus Christ will allow us the ability to move forward, understand God's plan for us, and help us assist others in their journey through mortality as well. The people in each of these stories were able to help countless others because of their faith in Christ, and as we leave behind our own legacies, we will also one day, be an example of the believers to those who come after us. I know that focusing my faith in Jesus Christ has brought me so much peace, clarity, and direction when things get stormy and unclear. I know that we won't know the answers all at once, but God will give us what we need, when we need it as we put our faith in Him.

I love you oh so much!

Emily

You Can Regain What You Have Lost

Sometimes reading about the pride fall of the Nephites just breaks your heart.  They have received so much light and knowledge and blessings.  Yet still they fall.  But we aren't so different from them.  If we don't learn from their mistakes, we too will fall into the pattern.

As I've been studying Alma, not only have I learned a lot about how to avoid the pride fall, I've learned how to recuperate from it.  By Alma 55, the Nephites have risen and fallen a couple of times.  After contentions among their own people. the Nephites were left weak, the Lamanites took control, and for a couple of chapter now the Nephites are working to gain their power, land, and people back.  I love that God is so merciful that He always gives them a chance to repent, rebuild, and strengthen themselves again.  In this chapter, there is a GIANT IMPORTANT MESSAGE:

YOU CAN REGAIN WHAT YOU HAVE LOST!

Through a very cool plan that basically involves getting the Lamanites drunk and stealing back the Nephite prisoners, the Nephites "began again to be victorious, and to reclaim their rights and their privleges."  The Lamanites tried everything to get the power back; they tried to get the Nephites drunk, poison them, attack them at night, but nothing worked.  Why?  What is different about the Nephites now?

"The Nephites were not slow to remember the Lord their God in this their time of affliction.  They could not be taken in their [the Lamanites'] snares."

So far in Alma, we have learned that the number one way to keep yourself from falling into the pride cycle is to always remember God and Jesus Christ.  Alma 55 shows us that the number one way to regain what you've lost after falling into the pride cycle is the same thing: to always remember God and Jesus Christ.  Isn't it interesting that this is a part of our baptismal covenant?  What a loving Heavenly Father we have who gives us all of the tools we need to be successful in this life and avoid the pitfalls of the natural man!  We have all that we need to get back to Him.  We just have to apply it. 

I know that if we remember God and Jesus Christ in our lives, we will not fall into the snares that Satan puts before us.  They may hurt us a bit, and we may struggle and feel sad or lost, but we will not fall.  Because remembering Jesus Christ means we have built our house upon Him.  With the rock as our foundation, we will not fall.  It is a promise from God. Whether we are avoiding the pride fall or regaining what we have lost after falling, as we do our part to remember and follow Jesus Christ, we will receive the promises of God. 

Love,

Rachel   

Is Anger Bad?

I love reading about Moroni in the Alma chapters of the Book of Mormon, because he actually gets angry quite a bit.  Many people are uncomfortable with this idea.  Isn't anger bad?  Shouldn't we squelch that?

Remember when Jesus Christ got mad when people were using the temple to make a profit?  And he turned over the tables and cast them out?

Remember when Moroni got mad at Ammoron for causing so much death and pain for the Lamanites and Nephites?  Remember when he threatened to go after him and kill all his people if he didn't stop what he was doing?

Remember when the prophets describe God as angry when His people don't obey Him or when they cause a lot of problems for other people?  Or He gets angry when His people don't repent?

But wait....anger is bad, right?  Why do Moroni, Jesus Christ, and even God himself get angry?

To understand this, we must first look at motives.  Truth and goodness versus lies and evil always come down to motives.  Second, we must look at how they decided to use their anger.

Motives:

• Christ was angry at the people in the temple because they were warping and degrading a sacred place, His Father's house.
• Moroni was angry because of the injustice of Ammoron and the Lamanites.  
• God was angry because of the spiritual state of His children.

Second, what did these three decide to do with their anger?

• Christ used his anger to right a wrong and jolt the people into repentance and change.
• Moroni used his anger to protect his people, stand up for the cause of God, and warn the Lamanites of their spiritual danger.
• God used His anger to humble His people, so that they repent and can return to Him.  Although sometimes He gets angry, He always emphasizes that His hand is stretched out still.  

So what do we see?

These three men are not controlled by their anger.  Moroni, for example, could have killed the Lamanites a long time ago.  He even had an opportunity to kill the Lamanite leader, but instead gave them all a chance to covenant to change.  His anger is sparked by injustice, but he uses it to promote change and fight for goodness.  Jesus Christ also has the eternal perspective in mind during the scene at the temple.  We can see he was not out of control because while turning over the tables, he took great care not to hurt the animals.  But the people needed a big statement to jolt them out of their hardened mindset.  Christ used his anger to motivate others to repent and keep their covenants.  God loves us so much, and He is willing to do anything to help us get back to Him.  Sometimes the thing that we need is discipline and truth like a sword.  Sometimes we need a difficult trial in order to humble us enough to see from a eternal perspective and have a desire to change.  His anger is always motivated by an eternal perspective and His perfect love for us.

Thus, anger is NOT BAD.

I know it sounds weird...because many people say that anger is inherently evil.  But if you look at the prophets' words about anger, they are always condemning uncontrollable and unjust anger.  Anger that cuts and hurts and destroys, but not anger itself.  We can't let our anger control us.  But anger is an indication of injustice, that something we see is not right.  Once we define what is wrong, we can use our anger to do good.  It is a tool through which we can promote change as long as we use it with a basis of love and an eternal perspective.  If we use it well, we can help God's children on their path to eternal life.

I'm sure I will develop this line of thought more since I am so fascinated by the topic of emotion...I'm almost positive that it will be my life study.
 
Any thoughts about this?

I love you!
Rachel

The Importance of God's Love in the Process of Repentance

Inspired by Emily's post today, I decided to focus my studies on the topic of a broken heart and repentance.  I feel like whenever I am bogged down by a heavy weight that I just can't seem to carry anymore, it may be a sign that I haven't been using the atonement enough in my life, and I need to redouble my efforts.  Because many people in the scriptures were living in difficult situations like captivity, yet they were still free and happy.  I believe that no matter our circumstances, we can be free of weight.  When we take the yoke of Christ upon us, our burden is light.  I guess my yoke has been slipping off recently, or I haven't been taking what I need to to the Lord.

In order to repent, we need the grace of God.  Sometimes I think of grace like a gift that I receive after I put in all I have or a result of my own efforts.  But that's not how it works.  We can only be cleansed when we repent AND rely on God's saving grace.  Even in the act of repentance, we must depend on God.  Grace must be a part of our repentance process, not something we expect after we are done or have earned it.  I think a tactic of Satan is to convince us that we need to earn the love of God.  That we need to earn the grace of God.  The only thing that we need to receive the love and grace of God is a broken heart.  That is why God requires it.  He wants to give us his love and grace because He knows that is the only way we can repent.  We cannot repent alone.

Repentance is an act of faith in Jesus Christ.  I love what lds.org says about what this means.  Acting in faith is acknowledging the power of Christ's Atonement.  It is accepting the terms that He set when He paid the penalty for our sins: use His gift!  And (this is my favorite part because I hadn't thought about it before) we must GRATEFULLY recognize His Atonement and His power to cleanse us from sin.  I think gratitude is the key to maintaining a broken heart.  Seeing God's hand in our lives helps us remember that He loves us, that Satan is wrong and lying to us, and that we will be okay.  With that knowledge, we don't close our heart in fear.  Thus, the only way that we are even able to exercise our faith unto repentance is by acknowledging Christ's power, fulfilling His requirements by using His gift, and recognizing it with gratitude.  Only then will our hearts be prepared and open to receive God's love and grace, the two necessary enablers in the process of repentance.

I know that God's love is always there.  God's love can cast out the dark clouds that sometimes surround us.  I know that God wants to heal us and will forgive us, because I have felt His redeeming power in my own life.  He knows exactly what we need to get to a greater degree of happiness and freedom.  Many times what we need is a trial, and while we are struggling and trembling, we must recognize that even the trial itself is an evidence that God loves us.  He gives us hard things sometimes to guide us to an abundance of blessings.  I am so grateful for Jesus Christ who stands by us with patience, acceptance, and love and never loses sight of what we can become.

With gratitude,

Rachel    

"Of You, It Is Required to Forgive All Men"- Yourself Included!

I've been pondering a ton on repentance lately. It is a crucial part of our lives- not just a one time occurrence, but daily acts of changing and aligning our heart with God.

One of the most important steps of repentance that I believe truly is one of the hardest, comes at the end- being able to forgive yourself after you have brought it all to God. Most of the time, it is much easier said than done. But I am discovering as we come to more fully understand the savior's perfect love for each one of his children, us included, we will understand why we should forgive ourselves. When a gift is given, in this case, the gift of repentance is given because of christ's atonement, the giver of the gift (christ) rejoices when we use it to it's fullest. But if we neglect any portion of the gift, it cause him pain, rejection, and a whole lot of sadness. What would have been the point of his agony and suffering for you- to completely free you of your sins, mistakes, and pains- if you won't allow yourself to be forgiven? I definitely have to learn this one the hard way- but Christ puts it much more eloquently than me in the following account:

In Mosiah 26, the church is experiencing a whole lot of drama. But let's be honest, when is that ever new? The rising generation, too young to understand and internalize king benjamin's sermon, are not converted to the gospel of Christ. Because of their unbelief, their transgressions end up leading even faithful members of the church to mess up- some of them real big time. Alma the younger, the head of the church at the time, had never seen such a crazy amount of falling away before- and was so distraught as to what he needed to do. He knew these people were still children of God, he knew they had eternal worth in God's sight. He was probably nervous about how to go about disciplining them- and ultimately, he wanted to make sure that he was acting properly in the name of God as to what the consequences of their actions would be. The Lord tells Alma, "because thou hast inquired of the transgressor, thou art blessed.  And he that will hear my voice shall be my sheep; and him shall ye receive into the church, and him will I also receive.

For behold, this is my church; whosoever is baptized (taking the sacrament weekly) shall be baptized unto repentance. And whomsoever ye receive shall believe in my name; and him will I freely forgive."

The main reason we covenant with God to take Christ's name on ourselves is to give us the ability to repent when we do mess up. Does God really expect us to never ever make a single mistake after we're baptized? Heck no! He knows we are all mortal, that we all have weaknesses- but He knows through making our individual mistakes, we will come to know the need for our savior personally. He knows through the savior's atonement we will learn through repentance and that we will desire to continue to leave behind the habits and actions that take us away from Him. If we can't forgive ourselves once we have repented, then we are blocking our own eternal progression.

For it is I that taketh upon me the sins of the world; for it is I that hath created them; and it is I that granteth unto him that believeth unto the end a place at my right hand. Therefore I say unto you, Go; and whosoever transgresseth against me, him shall ye judge according to the sins which he has committed; and if he confess his sins before thee and me, and repenteth in the sincerity of his heart, him shall ye forgive, and I will forgive him also.

Yea, and as often as my people repent will I forgive them their trespasses against me.

 And ye shall also forgive one another your trespasses; for verily I say unto you, he that forgiveth not his neighbor’s trespasses when he says that he repents, the same hath brought himself under condemnation."

Honestly, only God can judge the position of the heart. It is our job to introspect our own hearts daily. As we come to better understand the atonement of Christ and its ability to heal and grant us the ability to change, we will better be able to forgive ourselves, and in turn, forgive those who may be following similar paths or just dealing with their own issues.
I know that I have made mistake after mistake in my life. I know there are so many experiences that I cannot even begin to comprehend why God would forgive me for doing it- especially when I feel like I know better. But I have come to learn that I am not my mistakes. I am a daughter of a Heavenly, perfect, whole being. He is a kind, loving, and also a just Father. Because of His love, He created a way for me and each one of His children to experience mercy and change through our savior Jesus Christ: "And thus mercy can satisfy the demands of justice, and encircles them in the arms of safety...only unto him that has faith unto repentance is brought about the great and eternal plan of redemption." Alma 34:16

If we truly have faith in Jesus Christ, that his power will completely cleanse us of our past mistakes and pains, then our faith will allow us to truly repent- to change and to believe we are forgiven. Isn't is wonderful how each step of the gospel is intertwined? You won't repent if you don't have faith, and you can't fully repent unless you believe in Christ all the way- it's all connected. Once you do change, your repentance will strengthen your faith, and your increasing faith will inspire you to continually repent. I love my Father in Heaven and I know He wants you to continue to draw nearer to Him. One of the most important ways we can do that is remembering to forgive ourselves.

I love you so much!
Emily