I was reading in Luke 22 today, and was really touched by how well Christ is able to live in the moment with his disciples. In this chapter, Christ prepares for his entire purpose, performing the atonement for our sins in the garden of Gethsemane, followed by his torture, death on the cross, and resurrection. Without these events, his entire ministry, although insightful and life changing, would have been absolutely meaningless. Without the atonement, even if each of us decided to live a life aligned with his teachings, it'd be impossible to make it back to the presence of God again.
Anyhows, Christ knows that this will be the most difficult, terrifying, and most painful thing he has ever and will ever do in his life. Despite this knowledge, he is able to make the most of the time he has left with his disciples and not only enjoy his last passover (aka his last supper) with them, but also turn it into a teaching opportunity for everyone there. Man oh man, what a guy, right? He says, "I have desired to eat this passover with you before I suffer," as they are about to eat.
So what enables him to focus on those around him, instead of having a pity party (which would totally be fine, knowing what it is he's about to endure and experience)? What keeps him from shutting down, wanting to be alone, and taking out any fears or concerns he may have on those closest to him?
I feel it all comes down to one thing: he remembers the WHY. He knows why he is performing the atonement in the first place- to allow each and everyone of his disciples (and the rest of us) an opportunity to overcome the effects of physical death, as well as each on of our shortcomings, mistakes, imperfections, etc. Because he knew and internalized these reasons- he kept his mind focused on the eternal, Christ had the ability to sit down with these men and teach them the why as well. Not only that- but he was able to sit down with both Peter AND Judas- both were to betray him, in two totally different ways- and he did not attack either one of them. He did not tell either of them to leave. He simply stated what would happen, and continued to spend his evening with those closest to him. He knew both their hearts (Peter acting out of fear and weakness, while Judas was acting selfishly) and recognized the atonement he was about to perform would make up for every unjust action about to take place.
He tells Peter, "When thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren." For some reason, I thought he only told Peter this after his resurrection, but I didn't realize Christ said this to Peter beforehand. Christ knows where each one of us is individually on our journey. He knew where Peter was spiritually in that moment, and he knew he'd mess up that night, multiple times. But Christ also knew who Peter was to become. He knew that Peter had the potential to choose to become one of the greatest apostles, someone on whom he could completely rely. And it was Peter's mistakes that enabled him to become that great apostle.
A little further on in the conversation, Christ asks,
"When I sent you without purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: and he hath no sword, let him sell his garment and buy one." (Luke 22:35-38)
When the apostles first set out with Christ, they had simply their faith to go off of. As they spent more time with him, their faith grew, their knowledge expanded, and their hearts and actions began to change as their understanding increased. But they definitely did NOT know everything at this point- and I feel Christ is reminding them that stage by stage, God knows where they are and will provide for them. And God expects us to act to the best of our ability at each stage. It made me think of the scripture from the sermon on the mount:
"Therefore, take no thought, saying, what shall we eat, or what shall we drink, or wherewithal shall we be clothed? ...For your Heavenly Father knoweth ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you."
(Matthew 6:31-33)
God knows where we are. He knows where we've been. And Christ has the ability to completely understand our hearts, nature, and actions in a way that no one else can. With the help of Christ and Heavenly Father, we each have the ability to progress on our journey, whatever it is that is required of us. What an amazing promise!
I feel like I'm kinda all over the place with this study, but I just want to say, I love that Christ used some of his last peaceful moments before the atonement to teach his disciples of eternal truths that would help them grow without him there. I love that he was able to make the most of the time that he had with them, acknowledging that they are all imperfect, and at different stages of their progression, but still living with them and being with them, regardless of the mistakes he knew they would make. It's all about that eternal love, you guys. Anyhowsers, I sure am enjoying reading more about Christ's life and am excited for what I will continue to learn.
Thanks for all you do and all you are!
Love,
Emily
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